Age Difference

by **Doobie** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 12:06 am

Well, I have opposed huge age differences in relationships for quite some time, but is 3 years that big a difference? I always hated older guys that get with younger girls, like 20 year olds with 16 year olds or w.e. Those girls are illusionized by the money and how old the guy is and the car and his looks, that they just give it all to him. Making them stupid. But at work the other day I met a girl who is 14 and is about to turn 15, and I am really feeling a vibe with her. I don't know why I made a thread about this, but I have a guiltiness concerning the age difference. By the way this is the only girl that got my mind off my ex girlfriend. I really don't know. What is the biggest age difference in relationship you ever had, or what you find acceptable or unaceptable in age difference. By the way I am 17. Thanks

by **Jing** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 12:07 am

er... i was a senior and this one girl was a freshmen. so i was like 3 years older

i think the age difference shouldnt be more than like 4 years

by **J@3** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 12:10 am

I think the actual age is more important than the age difference in question. For instance, a 5 year gap between a 40 year old and a 45 year old is nothing, but a 10 and a 15 year old? As far as your case goes... how long until you turn 18? I'd have a problem with a 17 year old and a 14 year old, but like you said she's about to turn 15. IF you do get into a relationship try and keep it "clean" for a while, because if you did sleep with her or whatever it would be illegal. That being said, if you have a good mental connection with her that won't be too difficult.

by **Doobie** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 12:14 am

I'm turning 18 in April, her birthday is in September, so its a 18-15 relationship. I feel guilty about it and its holding me back from going any furthur.

by **Matt** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 12:16 am

What Jae said essentially.

Personally i wouldn't go minus 2, mostly because that would mean that the chick can't drink and is still in HS.

by **-BHZMAFIA-** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 5:25 am

Matt wrote:What Jae said essentially.

Personally i wouldn't go minus 2, mostly because that would mean that the chick can't drink and is still in HS.

That's true, but drinking wouldn't be a big factor to me. I'm not a big fan of drinking. If you do decide to sleep with her, make sure you do it before you turn 18 though.

by **Big-D** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 5:31 am

DoobieKnicks wrote:I'm turning 18 in April, her birthday is in September, so its a 18-15 relationship. I feel guilty about it and its holding me back from going any furthur.

Jail Bait. Dont do it.

by **axare** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 6:05 am

I'm thirteen man...i only had 2 relationships....errm...biggest age dif would be several months....

I think the age dif of a relationship shouldnt be more than 5 years...

by **Its_asdf** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 7:55 am

The age difference really depends on the age of couple.

I'm pretty sure that most parents' have at least an age gap of like 3-5 years, some parents are even ten years older than their partner.

But since you're like 17 and the girl is 15, I wouldn't say that is too bad of a difference.

The only thing is to not to go and too good of a time with someone younger than you. :hump:

by **Ruff Ryder** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 10:39 am

Big-D wrote:
DoobieKnicks wrote:I'm turning 18 in April, her birthday is in September, so its a 18-15 relationship. I feel guilty about it and its holding me back from going any furthur.

Jail Bait. Dont do it.

I agree with that lol. I think it's too close to mess with. If you and her were a bit older, I'd think it was alright. 22 and 25 isn't bad but I think just the fact that you guys are so young. Plus if you guys were to get into the sexually active part of the relationship and later there was some kind of relationship ending beef, both of you are at the age where she can call rape on you...

But maybe you should start as friends and work into it or something.

by **j.23** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 10:44 am

doobie, come to canada. if you're 19, you can have sex with a 14 year old -- although they're passing a bill to change it to 16. lol. GANGBANG!!

by **Jeffx** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 11:33 am

DoobieKnicks wrote:Well, I have opposed huge age differences in relationships for quite some time, but is 3 years that big a difference? I always hated older guys that get with younger girls, like 20 year olds with 16 year olds or w.e. Those girls are illusionized by the money and how old the guy is and the car and his looks, that they just give it all to him. Making them stupid. But at work the other day I met a girl who is 14 and is about to turn 15, and I am really feeling a vibe with her. I don't know why I made a thread about this, but I have a guiltiness concerning the age difference. By the way this is the only girl that got my mind off my ex girlfriend. I really don't know. What is the biggest age difference in relationship you ever had, or what you find acceptable or unaceptable in age difference. By the way I am 17. Thanks

Dude, I'm in my early 40's and I dated a woman in her early twenties. No problem at all. I'd probably still be with her now if she didn't bring up marriage. I prefer younger chicks, but I will look at older women if they're in shape.

by **Ruff Ryder** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 11:57 am

Jeffx wrote:
DoobieKnicks wrote:Well, I have opposed huge age differences in relationships for quite some time, but is 3 years that big a difference? I always hated older guys that get with younger girls, like 20 year olds with 16 year olds or w.e. Those girls are illusionized by the money and how old the guy is and the car and his looks, that they just give it all to him. Making them stupid. But at work the other day I met a girl who is 14 and is about to turn 15, and I am really feeling a vibe with her. I don't know why I made a thread about this, but I have a guiltiness concerning the age difference. By the way this is the only girl that got my mind off my ex girlfriend. I really don't know. What is the biggest age difference in relationship you ever had, or what you find acceptable or unaceptable in age difference. By the way I am 17. Thanks

Dude, I'm in my early 40's and I dated a woman in her early twenties. No problem at all. I'd probably still be with her now if she didn't bring up marriage. I prefer younger chicks, but I will look at older women if they're in shape.

But I think the thing is that neither of them are mature enough or adults. Well, I'd think its kinda weird to have a 20 year gap but thats my personal preference. But I'm sure(well I hope) both of you are mature adults and you guys could handle it.

by **dada** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 12:12 pm

deleted

by **Matt** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 3:27 pm

i got a friend who's got a GF that takes away his life. Before he'd drink and have a good time.....now he can't drink and she makes him go home at 11:30. Fuck me it's annoying, she's got a hold of his balls. Apart from mondays he aint got not free time to hang out with the fellas cos he's gotta cater to his evi succubus woman......enough ranting.

by **Colin** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 4:11 pm

I figure that going 2 years less than you is the max until you hit 21 or so. And nothing's weirder than that creepy guy who graduated a few too many years ago that went to prom with a current grad.

by **Tuomas** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 5:57 pm

My friend (21) had a gf turning 18 this year, so they had a 3½ year age difference and boy did it show, the girl was a kid and acted as one. The guy had no free time whatsoever and they broke up pretty quickly, with no regrets on my friend's side. I'd personally wouldn't go under 18 (I'm 20), but of course it depends on the personality as well.

by **CERVANTES** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 7:48 pm

My sister is 14 and her boy is 17... But I think the age difference matters with those ages. I mean a 12 years old with a 15 one... looks kinda weird, but if it's 21 and 24 bah, It just doesn't matter.

by **The X** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 7:52 pm

Matt wrote:i got a friend who's got a GF that takes away his life. Before he'd drink and have a good time.....now he can't drink and she makes him go home at 11:30. Fuck me it's annoying, she's got a hold of his balls. Apart from mondays he aint got not free time to hang out with the fellas cos he's gotta cater to his evi succubus woman......enough ranting.

most girls are like that....it's not that the guy doesn't want to go out, it's just it's not worth the girl bitching or whining or the trouble that comes with it....I still drink & do whatever, but my party days are essentially over....but that doesn't bother me, as I'm not after tail anymore, & can't handle as much grog as before....but yeah, my gf is nowhere near as bad as some of my other friend's ones....if I want to do something, I put my foot down & it will happen....the rest of the time, I'm mellow, avoid discomfort etc....

as for the topic, my gf is 2 years younger than me, which for me, is a good gap....I know when I was 17, I didn't want to date anyone younger than 16, although I probably would've gone for a 15 year old if she was real hot & real nice or something....I would definitely not have gone for a 14 year old when I was 17, nor a 15 year old when I was 18....they are easy pickings though....as a soon-to-be 18 year old, set your limit at 16, unless this girl is unbelievable, then make the exception....now at my age (old), if I was single, I wouldn't touch anyone who was younger than 18....I would score 18-21 year olds if hot, but wouldn't be looking for relationship....anyways, I've obviously thought about this topic far too much, so I'm just going to stop right now :oops:

Bluesky · by **Andrew** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 8:11 pm

Jae wrote:I think the actual age is more important than the age difference in question. For instance, a 5 year gap between a 40 year old and a 45 year old is nothing, but a 10 and a 15 year old? As far as your case goes... how long until you turn 18? I'd have a problem with a 17 year old and a 14 year old, but like you said she's about to turn 15. IF you do get into a relationship try and keep it "clean" for a while, because if you did sleep with her or whatever it would be illegal. That being said, if you have a good mental connection with her that won't be too difficult.

I'd agree with that. (Y)

If I had to put a number on it at your age, I'd say two years max.

Also, aside from the law maturity could be an issue since 15 year olds aren't always as mature as they believe they are. For some people, 15 is in the midst of a rebellious, difficult and still somewhat immature era whereas at 17/18 you're getting close to moving on to another stage of life. It varies from person to person though, I think the age of consent would be a bigger worry to begin with.

by **Matt** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 8:32 pm

if I want to do something, I put my foot down & it will happen....the rest of the time, I'm mellow, avoid discomfort etc....

well at least you have some say in what you do. Some guys just get their balls confiscated once they get a GF.

I think the age of consent would be a bigger worry to begin with

reminds me of this one guy who's GF was underrage and he was 3yrs older than her....and they slept together, but later he wanted to break up with her but she wouldn't let him do that and said she'd tell her cop dad if he did break up. So he was forced to see this psycho bitch.

Bluesky · by **Andrew** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 9:20 pm

I've heard stories similar to that before. It all comes back to immaturity; she obviously wasn't ready for a mature relationship and thus when he called it quits she opted for a childish course of action.

by **Fenix** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 9:57 pm

Wait, wait... I'm 19, so me dating a 16 year old is wrong? The 16 year old girls I know look and act more mature than most guys of my age, so I don't think there's something wrong with it. I consider myself to be a kid, so I think it's nothing wrong with me if I date another one. I was always the youngest in my class, so I looked at my classmates as big sisters who are more mature than me, which is especially obvious now when I'm in college. Perhaps that means I'm going to be a late bloomer or something, but I don't have any problems communicating with 16, 17 year olds and their alleged 'immaturity'.

Bluesky · by **Andrew** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 11:00 pm

No, and I never said it was. I was referring to someone of Doobie's age, since a girl that's only two years younger than him is going to be 15 going on 16 and there's less complication there than with a girl who's 14 on going on 15 because of the laws regarding the age of consent. I also said that it varies from person to person. Some people are mature for their age but a lot of teenagers aren't as mature as they'd like to think they are.

Don't get me wrong, I don't mean any disrespect to our teenage members, I've been surprised to find out how young some people are because of the way they post. Furthermore, I'm 21 (turning 22 in a couple of months), so I'm not that far removed from my teen years myself and I know I still had immature tendencies when I was 15/16, perhaps even up until the end of my teens. Truth be told, I probably still have some growing up to do as I still don't feel ready to get married or start a family just yet.

You can call my previous post about teenagers having a certain level of immaturity an allegation if you wish but I think most psychologists and people who've gone through their teens would see it as a fact, not an opinion. They're still developing years and some people develop slower than others especially when it comes to the mental aspects of growing up. I refer mainly to teenagers who assert they're grown up because they do perceivced "grown up things" - drinking, smoking, sex - when such things do not necessarily identify someone as being mature or an adult for that matter. Insisting you're mature or trying to prove you're mature really has the opposite effect. Mature people have nothing to prove nor do they need to advertise.

So no, I don't think that you, a 19 year old, dating a 16 year old is to be automatically considered "wrong" and it's certainly not wrong in the eyes of the law either. If you have a connection with each other and can handle a relationship, great. However, I'd say most of us still have a lot to learn even as we hit 16 and that can be an issue in relationships and when you're talking about someone younger than 16, you're also talking about serious legal ramifications.

by **Matthew** on Mon Jul 31, 2006 11:05 pm

I have somthing againts our teenage memebrs :crazy:

. But on topic, doobie, age is only a number essentially. Would you date a girl strictly based on her age? Would you also not date a girl based on her age (within the obvious relms of sanity)?

The bottom line isn't what we think. With relationships, go with your heart, go with your head. If you need advice, turn to your parents or siblings/cousins/close friends.

But if I was in your shoes... and I honestly felt like I had somthing special with the girl, then yes I would go out with her. Take that for whatever its worth.

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