random thread

[Riot]

I thought it was a pimple, but this shit swelled up and it's like purple-red. When I accidently popped it, it was some weird transparent sticky puss followed by blood. Note to self: I better restrict that information to the freestyle thread only.

Shit dude, that's a janglo spider. They have those up north (Minnesota too) and those things are serious. You better go to a doctor, my dad got bite by one of those and his whole neck got swollen in 3 weeks. He could barely breathe. If it wasn't for my mom driving him to the hospital he would have died.

[cyanide]

k, I'll see a doctor, just to be safe.

Btw, there's no such thing as a janglo spider. Perhaps you spelled it wrong?

[Doobie]

I think he made it up . Janglo sounds like a pornstars name.

[cyanide]

That's what I thought. Riot's trying to scare me Nonetheless, I think I'd like to see a doctor in case this thing might be serious after all.

[Riot]

Yeah I made it up to see if you would freak out and run to the emergency room right away.

You know what sucks for you? You live in Canada so you'd be stuck on a waiting list for a month to get it looked at.

[Doobie]

I thought Canadian healthcare was way better then american healthcare.

[cyanide]

I can go to any clinic and get it checked within an hour for free, or call Health Link and talk to a registered nurse within a minute (24/7) for free

[Riot]

I thought Canadian healthcare was way better then american healthcare.

That's an opinion. For poor people it's better, but if you live in America and make an honest living American healthcare>Canadian health care.

[Doobie]

since this is the random thread , i just wanted to point out that i spent time looking at a shitload a post , and im one of the few people who doesnt capitalize or use punctuation.

[cyanide]

That's an opinion. For poor people it's better, but if you live in America and make an honest living American healthcare>Canadian health care.

That's bullshit to the highest degree. Wtf is "honest living"? Sounds like more of that American propaganda they've been spoon feeding you all these years.

j/k, but seriously, in all cases Canadian health care > American. Just ask any honest American citizen.

[Riot]

Is that why many Candians come down to America to get health treatment? Or why many Canadians die on a waiting list? Or why Canada banned private healthcare (one of the only countries in the world to do so, maybe even the only)?

[Doobie]

LMAO cy , sorry i point it out now , but i just realized that P diddy think you got in your signature . IDK y i found it hilarious , that guy gets on my nerves .

[cyanide]

Riot: What? I think we had this discussion before (about the waiting list and private health care) I have private health care, and I think most provinces in Canada has that, so I don't know where you're getting your news from... all I know is that many Americans flock to Canada to get medication that they can't afford in Canada.

Doobie: The guy's an idiot, hence I put it in my sig

[Riot]

http://www.opinionjournal.com/editorial ... =110006813

http://www.heartland.org/Article.cfm?artId=10462

http://www.huppi.com/kangaroo/L-healthcare.htm

[Bang]

What the hell is the deal with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

They're ninjas, but they never kill anyone.
They're ninjas, but they never use stealth.
They're ninjas, but their main meal consists of pizza.
What they wear are not ninja stuff.
Why do they have artists' names?

Where the hell did they get the idea anyhow?
Guy1: Dude, let's make a cartoon with ninjas.
Guy2: Yea, but let's make them turtles.
Guy1: WTF?
Guy2: Yea man, people will dig it more.
Guy1: You're high.
Guy2: Hell yea. They should also use surfer terms too...like Cowabunga.
Guy1: You're insane, this will never work.
Guy2: Trust me, bro. We should also name them after the four greatest artists of the renaissance, dude. That would be awesome.
Guy1: You mean Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael and Michaelangelo? WTF??
Guy2: Yea man, so they like Pizza. Pizza rocks man.
Guy1: Damn, can I buy some pot from you?
Guy2: Sure man.

I'm assuming it went like that.

[cyanide]

http://www.opinionjournal.com/editorial/feature.html?id=110006813

http://www.heartland.org/Article.cfm?artId=10462

http://www.huppi.com/kangaroo/L-healthcare.htm

The first one doesn't really apply to Alberta, the second one sounds exactly nothing like what I've been seeing here, and the third link simply shows America as being the worst...

[Jackal_]

Fuck you guys are geeks.

[Riot]

The third one wasn't suppose to go in there, I thought I had a different link.

Anyways, I've been to Canada and I've heard people complaining about the health care system. I don't know about you, but I'd rather have my own damn health care where I can cover myself and my family at my own cost where I can pick my own plan and my own company. The Canada health care sucks and so does America's but America's fits my preference best.

[Mentally Hilarious]

Shit... it's like -03.8 AM or some other invented time. Early as hell though. Why am I up? Answer me! DEAR GOD, WHY AM I AWAKE?

The kick-off starts in 30 min, that's why. But I don't want to go, random bingedrinking with loads of fun people is very nice - but not this fucking early.

This is my random thought: why did I ever concede into stop using nicotine? I like nicotine. And I hate not using it.

Ach. Now my first beer comes out of the cooler.

Toodles everyone.

Oh, and that Peter Griffin kid seems to be a moron of the degree that this forum only sees in the likes of wisdom_kid.

[Uncommon Sense]

new york should get some gigantic state fair, all we have is parades & the new years ball no fun.

[shadowgrin]

What the hell is the deal with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

They're ninjas, but they never kill anyone.
They're ninjas, but they never use stealth.
They're ninjas, but their main meal consists of pizza.
What they wear are not ninja stuff.
Why do they have artists' names?

1. Ninjas are assassins, they get paid to kill. Why would you kill if you're not paid? That's bad business.
2. You're a giant green ninja turtle in NY! Using stealth will be REALLY difficult. Unless you're a man who dresses as a bat.
3. What do ninjas eat anyway? Do they have a specific diet? Let them eat what they want to eat.
4. Not wearing ninja stuff? See #2.
5. The creators of the TMNT just liked it that way.

And the Turtles' mentor is a giant rat. Go figure.

As for the Turtles talking like half-baked surfer dudes, the "surfer culture" was popular when the TMNT were created back then.

Guy2: Yea man, people will dig it more.

You're right, it's all about the $$$.

[Jackal]

Nobody read my awesome story?

Mohfuckers.

[Uncommon Sense]

Woohoo! Randomness.

It's a dusty day on the Islands. The sun's just about to come up. There we see our lonesome hero (lonesome given he can't find any punani, not because it's cool) rising from the previous night of playing with himself. God, that was exhausting he says. Cut to the sunset, ah, isn't it beautiful? Wish that fucking sun would get extinguished by a large ass fire extinguisher, then I'd laugh my fucking ass off. Hah.

Jackal walks over to Coolmac's tipi (type of hut) and pisses right infront of his door. Well, what I suppose is his door. Stupid welcome mat, smell of urine from now on cocksucker, never again shall you welcome me without the stench of piss.

Whew, nice leak. Toddle toddle over to the sea. Bleh, mirky green, probably what Cyanide's ear infection is about to look like.

*grumble* goes the stomach. Ooh, grub thinks our lonesome (see above) hero. Wonder what we can eat today. In his brain: A flash of gorgeous punani. Back to reality, right you fucker, the day you get punani is the day PinoyIdol & Coolmac have kids. That reminds me, where is Mikki? Can't be seen so far.

Toddle toddle over to the hammock. Hah, tricked you mohfuckers didn't I? Never mentioned a hammock being in the story. Oh wait, I ruined the trick. As I said, mohfuckers.

Woah, what is that over there? Oh my god. It's a female. Wtf, she's got a fish growing out of her ass. Who cares, female = tits & punani! Uncommon Sense here I come!

Jackal (hyper): HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Uncommon Sense: Mmm..
Jackal: You got punani or what bitch?
Uncommon Sense: Punani? I can't sleep. What is this punani?

Zap.

Woah, someone beamed that bra saying girl (forgot name) chick to the island.

2 Punani's.

Other Chick: i hurd ya'll talk bout them punani, it true bra?
Jackal (perplexed): Is it a true bra? *Looks at Uncommon*
Uncommon: Huh?
Jackal: Grabs her shirt and peeks into her cleavage.
Uncommon: Oh noes!
Jackal: While running away like Cyanide (a little teenage girl who saw her sperm carriers bleeding out of her..you guessed it, punani) yells back to random girl: Sure was a real bra!!

Bam.

Shit, who the fuck put these random palm tree's on the fucking island? FUCK! That hurt my head. I hope little head can still get it up with alright.

Looks at the sun to figure out what time it is. Damn it. Too bright. Where's the fucking fire extinguisher when you need it?

Looks at Coolmac's tipi. Ah, it's on fire. Means it's 12, when the sun is right above our heads. Awesome.

Still haven't eaten. Ooh, lucky me! My penis head hit the palm tree so hard a coconut fell down. Let's eat it. Starts peeling the coconut, eats the skin & throws away the stupid nut. I mean, why would someone put in a dark brown nut into such a wonderful fruit? Dumbasses.

Wooha! There come the ninja's.

Ninjas: JAM JAM JAM!
Jackal: Jam what you fuckers?
Ninjas: Aww, don't be mean, ask nicely!
Jackal: Gosh, alright. What are you going to Jam....fuckers?
Ninjas.
Jackal: Tell me before I turn you all into turtles with my magical harry pothead magic!
Ninjas: Alright, it stands for our names. Jae, Andrew & Matthew = JAM! Hah! Aren't we clever.
Jackal: You mean you wasted my time all this time to tell me your names? You're supposed to be incognito idiots, ninja's remember? God.
Ninjas: Oh. *Start kicking Jackal's ass with whoosh whoosh sound effects created by the seagulls.*

Jackal: MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMY!

A white light appears: Son, this is God. Stop being such a fucking pansy and kick their asses already.
Jackal: While you're talkinga bout pansies, how bout you extinguish that fucking bright ball you cocksucker?
White light: That cocksucking was a one time thing fucker, you mention that again and I'll strike you down.
Jackal: Oh yeah? With what ? Lightening?
White light: Yes!
Jackal: Ok, hold on.

Yo jam guy ninja dudes, come over here.

Jackal (whispers) you know what would make you guys über fucking awesometastic?
Ninjas: What?
Jackal: If you say cocksucker really loudly.
Ninjas: Hah, we aren't doing that, we heard what he just said. That you'd think we'd fall for that...God, you're such a cocksucker.

Bright bolt of lightening hits.

Jackal:

Muahaha, I am the pwn. Now for some punani.

*runs off scurrying the jungles for a specimen called a Riot*

The end.

Oh, Filip's a bitch.

i dont get the fishy thing..
& are you calling me dumb....
is it because im a blonde?

[Jugs]

Hey I liked the story, it was, uh, Random, but uber good

Yay, I'm so rapt, i made it to the 14 and under (i'm 14 bitches) B grade Grand Final. We've been undefeated all season. And I might be going to 16 and under A grade, it depends

wooooooooooooooo!

[Bang]

1. Ninjas are assassins, they get paid to kill. Why would you kill if you're not paid? That's bad business.
2. You're a giant green ninja turtle in NY! Using stealth will be REALLY difficult. Unless you're a man who dresses as a bat.
3. What do ninjas eat anyway? Do they have a specific diet? Let them eat what they want to eat.
4. Not wearing ninja stuff? See #2.
5. The creators of the TMNT just liked it that way.

1. Good point.
2. LOL. Why turtles then? Couldn't they be mongooses? or Pizza Cats? (another obscure show that doesn't make any sense) Oh wait, Pizza Cats are samurais, I forget.
3. Well, I would think they eat at http://www.ninjaburger.com obviously.
4. They could at least um...cover their mouths or something?
5. Good point.

More random stuff:
1. Will Jet Li and Jackie Chan ever do a movie together?
2. Why does Jackie Chan only make shitty movies now? (Medallion, Around the world in 80 days.)
3. Do people who watch cartoons really prefer the dubbed versions over subtitles?
4. Can we have a movie with Jet Li, Jackie Chan, Stephen Chow, Tony Ja and Walker Texas Ranger dude?
5. Has the Walker Texas Ranger dude ever shown up as a guest in Conan? That would hilarious. If not, why not? Does he even star/play an extra in any movie/show now?