Mitch Hedberg Dies At 37

Mitch Hedberg

1968-2005
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Mitch Hedberg in my opinion is the best comedian in the last decade. Hedberg, who struggled with drugs and alcohol, died in a hotel room in Livingston, N.J, Apparently from "heart failure." The reason I liked his act so much was because of manny things every great comedian has, his unique start-joke... pause... almost-finish-joke... pause... deliver-punch-line delivery was just great because of the person he was, and his mono-tone voice and his 70's stoner look. In this "comedic" industry, its hard for a comedian with as manny one-liners that Mitch had to make annything of himself, but he did. He would hit you with a one-liner, and before you were done laughing, he'd hit you with another one. Jokes that made you think, funny observations, and contidicting himself, was just genious. If you have an opoutunity to download some audio and/or video of him off of either LimeWire, BitTorrent, or KaZzA, please do so. We love you Mitch, you will never be forgotten. R.I.P
Great Mitch Hedberg Quotes-

*"I think Pringles' initial intention was to make tennis balls. But on the day that the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truckload of potatoes arrived. But pringles was a chill company so they said 'Fuck it. Cut 'em up.'"
*"I don't have a girlfriend. I just know this lady who'd be really mad if she heard me say that."
*"I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake."
*"I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long."
*"I hate turtlenecks. I have such a weak neck. Plus if you wear a turtleneck it's like being strangled by a really weak guy ... all day. And if you wear a turtleneck and a backpack it's like a weak midget trying to bring you down."
*"Whenever I walk, people try to hand me out fliers. And when someone tries to hand me out a flier, it's kinda like they're saying, 'Here — you throw this away.'"
*"On a traffic light green means go and yellow means yield, but on a banana it's just the opposite. Green means hold on, yellow means go ahead, and red means where the fuck did you get that banana at ..."
*"Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic. Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupus ... one of those two doesn't sound right."

For More Great Mitch Hedberg Quotes Click Here
Click Here To Buy His CD

Last edited by Mazzocchi on Sun Apr 03, 2005 7:15 am, edited 2 times in total.

Mitch Hedberg was great. he was so funny.

MITCH HEDBERG WAS THE FUNNIEST MAN ALIVE!

DAMN IT. I found out like...two days ago or something and I thought it was a horrible april fool's joke. It wasn't.

Minnesota man dead. Funny Minnesota man dead. He was freaking hilarious too, his one-liners were classic.

R.I.P.
DAMN he was funny. I didn't know he appeared in That 70's Show.

Never heard him but some of those quotes made me crack up...
R.I.P.

Same, those jokes were great

RIP, I don't know who he is but he was obviously funny.

You guys missed out. Like the thing says, go on limewire or kazaa and download some stuff. Like his Comedy Central Present's show.

was he better than chappell? if he was i might check him out

One time a guy handed me a picture of himself, and he said, "Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture of you is of when you were younger. Here's a picture of me when I am older. You son of a bitch, how'd you pull that off? Let me see that camera ...

His jokes are hilarious but it's his voice and his look that really make the jokes work.

was he better than chappell? if he was i might check him out

hm, i dunno Chappelle is pretty funny
His "white" voice is the best
(this might not be the exact wording but still)
"every concept sketch of a black criminal looks the same, its like they take the witness in and say [white voice]"well what did he look like"[/wv] and the person says "well, he was black an-"[wv]"Bald? tall? white nikes? say no more!"[/wv]"


but My favorite stand-ups (no particular order)-
Dane Cook,
George Carlin,
Mitch Hedberg,
Dave Chappelle,
Rodney Dangerfield,
Denis Leary.

and maybe some I cant think of

I can't get enough of Chris Rock. Bring the Pain uncut was hysterical

Robin Williams stand up is absolutly HILARIOUS.

Reading the quotes on that site, that guy was hilarious.

Dane Cook is pretty good.

D.L. Hughley and Chris Rock crack me up real good.

if you have a downloading program download robin williams bit about scottish people/ golf. Oh god its hilarious. If you have AIM im me at IndyPacers67 and ill send it to you. You will laugh your ass off, especially if you know scottish people or have ever met a scottish person.

I've heard hedberg lots of times and he's one of my favourites, but I never knew his name so I couldnt find anything else by him. Too bad he had to die before I found it out.

My top 5 are
Jerry Seinfeld (fuck you all, he's funny)
Mitch Hedberg
Robin Williams
Paul Rodriguez
Orny Adams

Jerry seinfelds stand up is not funny at all.

but the show is hilarious. probably one of the top 3 shows of all time.

but the show is hilarious. probably one of the top 3 shows of all time.

yea hthe show is awesome even though it's been old for almost 10 years

but the show is hilarious. probably one of the top 3 shows of all time.

yea hthe show is awesome even though it's been old for almost 10 years

but yet the jokes are still not outdated, they STILL apply! and STILL will in 10 years too probably.

Seinfeld has GOT to be on the top 3 comedy series of ALL TIME.

Seinfeld has GOT to be on the top 3 comedy series of ALL TIME.

agreed

My favourites:

Bill Bailey (I used to watch him on TV in England, and last night saw him doing an apparent cover of a song by Kraftwerk, the Hokey Pokey it was fuckin hilarious)
Ross Noble
Jasper Carrott
Ricky Gervais (From his new book about strange animals: "This is a glomp... latin name, glomp... he does absolutely nothing and dies")

I like British comedians, I reckon they're the best

yeah add up the accent and you're in for a tear jerker of laughs.....actually 3 out of the 4 people you mention i never heard of ever........i only knew Bill Bailey

felt like adding some favourite jokes from hedberg, get the attention of th is thread back on him (damn british)

-My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana, and I said, "No, but I want a regular banana for later, so yeah."

-This product that was on TV was available for four easy payments of $19.95. I would like a product that was available for three easy payments and one complicated payment. We can't tell you which payment it is, but one of these payments is going to be a bitch. The envelope will not seal, the stamps will be in the wrong denomination, the mail man will get shot, and you must pay in wampum. Good luck fucker

-2-in-1 is a bullshit term, because 1 is not big enough to hold 2. That's why 2 was created.

-The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how much I play, I'll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They're fucking relentless

-I was in a bar, minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, "You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit." As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.

-I'm gonna fix that joke... I'ma take all the words out and put new ones in it. That joke will be fixed

- I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin' and hook up with them later.

- I got my hair highlighted, because I felt some strands were more important than others.

-I tried to throw away a yo-yo. It was fucking impossible.