John Starks... lol too easy

Shawn Kemp probably wanted a certain procedure which kills off virility.
The Trailblazers will all probably get coal, regardless of what they wished for.
Isiah Rider, just one more chance... and maybe another after that.
Allen Iverson, a few more field goal attempts, and maybe a couple more injuries to make that FG% look a little better. Maybe a new gun? Some bitchin new tatts, and an invitation to play for team USA.
Wince Carter (yes Wince), this one's pretty obvious.
John Stockton, higher pressure shower heads, to easily remove those nasty stains.
Mamadou N'diaye, a name change.
Those poor Lakers... Shaq will probably want a new supporting cast, Kobe will want a number change from "8" to "23" to "45" and back to "23". Phil Jackson will ask for a veteran player, and Ron Harper will probably come out of retirement.
The Utah Jizz will probably ask for a third PG, somebody with young legs to give Stock and Jackson a break over the busy holidays. Tim Hardaway's still available.
add your own people, and take away some of the spotlight from my lame attempts
