Beale Street Ballin - Where the Grizzlies don't suck!

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GRIZZLIES.COM
BREAKING NEWS: David Stern suffers Heart Attack
October 20th, 2009



NBA Commissioner David Stern suffered a fatal heart attack at NBA headquarters according to sources. Supposedly right after he received news of Allen Iverson parting ways with Memphis Grizzlies organization before the preseason had even ended. "I didn't know the news would hit him like that, I ain't mean no harm or nothin. But in the end I'm one of the top three players in the league. Me, Kobe, and Lebron. I'm just not a reserve basketball player and I don't know why they was tryin' to force me to be one" said Iverson over the phone. Iverson posted on Twitter just weeks ago that God had picked Memphis as the place for him to continue his career. These two incidents leave the league without a commissioner and the Grizzlies without any kind of depth. More on the story as we get it.

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GRIZZLIES.COM
BREAKING NEWS: Jay-Z becomes new NBA Commissioner; announces league wide draft
October 21th, 2009



Businessman/entertainer Shawn "Jay-Z" Carter has shocked the entire sports world today. Not only was he announced as the new commissioner, but he also decided to sweep all 30 NBA teams of their talent. "I felt like it was time for a change in the league, it's time to get more people excited about the product we have to offer." said Jay-Z during his first press conference as commissioner. "Shout out to King James, hope to see you in that Knicks uniform soon!." said Mr. Carter after questions about his relationship with star LeBron James came up. "We gonna randomly pick the draft order, and give each team a new start". Many players and owners are against the move and some owners have been selling off their teams for cheap.

The first owner to do so was Grizzlies owner Michael Heisley, who would do anything to not spend money. "Heisley sold the team to a bunch of investors out of the city of Memphis. Hopefully these people have more sense than he had." said an NBA executive. A lot of people are wondering how this will work, especially on such short notice. The draft is just a few days from here, and the season is not too far after that. No NBA players have said they will pull their name from the draft, although many have been complaining via interview and Twitter.

[thaKEAF]

GRIZZLIES.COM
BREAKING NEWS: Charles Barkley in as Memphis GM; Chris Wallace out
October 22nd, 2009



The new brain trust behind the Memphis Grizzlies organization wasted no time making changes to it's front office. Chris Wallace received his walking papers soon after a meeting with the Grizzlies ownership earlier today. "Word around town is that he suggested picking Eddy Curry with the Grizzlies first round pick", said an anonymous source for the Grizzlies organization. Fans were not sad to see Wallace leave. His three year plan didn't pan out, and his only great move was trading for SG OJ Mayo on Draft Night 2008. His failures include the infamous Pau Gasol trade, signing Darko, trading Kyle Lowry for no apparent reason, and drafting Hasheem Thabeet #2 in this year's NBA draft.

Not soon after Charles Barkley held a press conference outside of the FedExForum promising to pull the fans of Memphis out of the misery they have been faced with for the majority of the team's stay in Memphis. "We gonna make our picks smart, we gonna make our picks basketball picks. Not money picks. Too long y'all been forced to watch garbage basketball because the people at the top had no clue what the hell they was doin'! Well Memphis, we promise you that this team will NOT suck!" yelled Barkley to the packed Memphis crowd. Barkley couldn't give us any hints on who he'd pick since the draft order hasn't been determined yet, he did let us know that he was gonna pick some of Memphis' best BBQ up from the Rendezvous later on today though.