U.S. Presidents

Some of you may know that I do things other than post stats or have incredibly boring arguments with people in between your self-pleasuring spam and this thread is sorta related to that although there is plenty of place here for self-pleasuring spam, just be warned there is also place here for stats.

Boring intro aside, here's some more boring text with the premise of the thread. Essentially, I consider that not just Americans but our foreign friends, even those from non-English speaking nations like the Canada, Philippines and Australia, can easily name six of our Presidents. Washington, Lincoln, H.W. Bush, Clinton, W. Bush and Obama. And the elite can throw up FDR, Nixon, Carter and Reagan as well.

And as we all know the President is the King of America, he has all powers and controls everything that happens in the nation so only he is to blame for any woes and only to get credit for the great achievements of the greatest nation the world has ever seen, will ever see and the most dominant in all sports that matter ever. Also, he has a secret stash to pay for everyones gas, groceries and rent from. That said, we have yet to have a President randomly swim out to sea never to appear again, even if one did go skinny dipping in the Potomac so regularly that someone could steal his clothes once. We've also never had a woman nor anyone with names like Pierre or Jean in charge.

America

Get to the point? Hey, the President himself walks in and gives a speech, he doesn't need any Queen to do it for him. So if you're done being all gaga on the radio we'll continue.

Anyway, here is a list of the U.S. Presidents. Do you know anything about them? At all? And don't go looking on Wiki or Google, I want to know for legitimate purposes what anyone, anywhere, actually does know about these 40 jerks.

Oh, because I didn't want to re-type out things or copy it, I copied it from something I wrote a while back where I ranked the Presidents. You can ask about the rankings if you want, I'll answer, but I post it here mostly because I didn't want to bother readjusting the order since there's way too many non-American terrorist scum who don't need to know the proper order of our Presidents lest they carry out attacks via time travel while they cry and rock back in forth due to our awesome.

0. William Henry Harrison - I'm assuming nobody will get this, but truly our best President. Gave his two-hour inaugural speech in a March rain, and then died a month later without doing anything but appoint his six cabinet members. (On me birthday!)
1. George Washington - He's #1 because he stepped down. No matter what else he did, this is impossible to top.
2. Grover Cleveland
3. Calvin Coolidge
4. Warren G. Harding
5. Thomas Jefferson
6. James K. Polk
7. John Tyler
8. Rutherford B. Hayes
9. James Monroe
10. Ronald Reagan
11. Chester A. Arthur
12. Dwight D. Eisenhower
13. Bill Clinton
14. Martin Van Buren
15. Andrew Jackson
16. James Madison
17. John F. Kennedy
18. Abraham Lincoln
19. Andrew Johnson
20. Ulysses S. Grant
21. William H. Taft
22. William McKinley
23. Gerald R. Ford
24. George H.W. Bush
25. Harry S Truman
26. Benjamin Harrison
27. George W. Bush
28. Theodore Roosevelt
29. Millard Fillmore
30. John Adams
31. Jimmy Carter
32. John Q. Adams
33. Barack Obama
34. Franklin Pierce
35. James Buchanan
36. Richard M. Nixon
37. Lyndon B. Johnson
38. Franklin D. Roosevelt
39. Herbert Hoover
40. Woodrow Wilson
NR. James A. Garfield
NR. Zachary Taylor.

0. William Henry Harrison - Supposedly the first president, but died too soon.
1. George Washington - The badass first president of the US. Probably drank too much. Has a portrait on US currency.
2. Grover Cleveland - *
3. Calvin Coolidge - Awesome name.
4. Warren G. Harding
5. Thomas Jefferson - One of the founding fathers for the Declaration of Independence.
6. James K. Polk - *
7. John Tyler
8. Rutherford B. Hayes - *
9. James Monroe - *
10. Ronald Reagan - Reaganomics
11. Chester A. Arthur
12. Dwight D. Eisenhower - WWII general
13. Bill Clinton - got head before nearly getting impeached, rode the internet bubble and one of US' greatest growth
14. Martin Van Buren - *
15. Andrew Jackson - *
16. James Madison - *
17. John F. Kennedy - assassinated before he could be the greatest president maybe
18. Abraham Lincoln - assassinated too. Helped in ending slavery and the Civil War
19. Andrew Johnson - *
20. Ulysses S. Grant - another war general, badass first name
21. William H. Taft - *
22. William McKinley
23. Gerald R. Ford - *
24. George H.W. Bush - Younger George's father who didn't do much
25. Harry S Truman - *
26. Benjamin Harrison
27. George W. Bush - ran the US economy to the ground with war spending on the Afghanistan and Iraq wars in response to 9/11
28. Theodore Roosevelt - *
29. Millard Fillmore
30. John Adams - *
31. Jimmy Carter - Won a Nobel Peace Prize well after serving a short presidency. Was around before the USSR collapse.
32. John Q. Adams - *
33. Barack Obama - Current US president. Undeserving of the Nobel Peace Prize.
34. Franklin Pierce
35. James Buchanan
36. Richard M. Nixon - Infamouse Watergate scandal.
37. Lyndon B. Johnson - *
38. Franklin D. Roosevelt - The New Deal
39. Herbert Hoover - Relation to the Hoover Dam?
40. Woodrow Wilson - *
NR. James A. Garfield - *
NR. Zachary Taylor.

* I've seen these names, just don't know anything about them.

I know who most of them are by name but I know virtually nothing about them outside of the obvious ones (Washington, Reagan, Clinton, JFK, Bush Jnr, Obama etc).

Off the top of my head. Can't really remember much, history was never my favorite subject.

0. William Henry Harrison - may have heard of him before, but don't have a clue who he is
1. George Washington - first president of the US (insert captain obvious joke here), led the States to victory over England, on the $1 bill
2. Grover Cleveland - don't know what he did, but the cleveland tourism song comes to mind
3. Calvin Coolidge -
4. Warren G. Harding
5. Thomas Jefferson - Third US president, wrote Dec. of Ind.
6. James K. Polk
7. John Tyler
8. Rutherford B. Hayes
9. James Monroe - established the Monroe Doctrine, probably thought himself as a "protector" of the Western Hemisphere
10. Ronald Reagan - very popular president, can't remember wtf he did to be that popular
11. Chester A. Arthur
12. Dwight D. Eisenhower
13. Bill Clinton - same case as Reagan
14. Martin Van Buren
15. Andrew Jackson
16. James Madison
17. John F. Kennedy - shot in the head while he was in a parade of sorts
18. Abraham Lincoln - reason black people in the States have the liberty to rob white people
19. Andrew Johnson
20. Ulysses S. Grant - war general for the North in the Civil War, friends in his cabinet were corrupted
21. William H. Taft
22. William McKinley
23. Gerald R. Ford
24. George H.W. Bush
25. Harry S Truman - dropped atomic bomb in Japan in WWII
26. Benjamin Harrison
27. George W. Bush - shit all over the US economy
28. Theodore Roosevelt - established reserve parks to prevent extinction, established the Food and Drug Administration
29. Millard Fillmore
30. John Adams
31. Jimmy Carter
32. John Q. Adams
33. Barack Obama - first black president, apparently hasn't done much to save the stinking economy
34. Franklin Pierce
35. James Buchanan
36. Richard M. Nixon - involved in the Water Gate Scandal, would put him lower on the list
37. Lyndon B. Johnson
38. Franklin D. Roosevelt -Don't know why benji put him this low, but w/e. Brought in the New Deal to stop the Great Depression, some of the programs still exist today.
39. Herbert Hoover - criticized and blamed for the Great Depression. Didn't help other people because he thought it would undermine self-respect
40. Woodrow Wilson
NR. James A. Garfield
NR. Zachary Taylor.

Last edited by Axel The Great on Thu Dec 09, 2010 9:51 am, edited 2 times in total.

Off the top of my head:

0. William Henry Harrison - "I died in 30 days!"

1. George Washington - The first US president. Had false teeth.

2. Grover Cleveland - Served two non-consecutive terms as president.

5. Thomas Jefferson - One of the main authors of the Declaration of Independence.

6. James K. Polk - Don't know much about him, except that Polk High School in Married...with Children was named for him.

10. Ronald Reagan - Former actor, served two terms in the 80s. Widow is Nancy Reagan.

12. Dwight D. Eisenhower - Nickname was Ike.

13. Bill Clinton - Pretty much anything he did in office tends to be trumped by things he did to people in his office (:giggity:) and as such, is still a comedy staple.

17. John F. Kennedy - Assassinated in 1963, by Lee Harvey Oswald according to some accounts. Conspiracy theories abound.

18. Abraham Lincoln - President during the American Civil War, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. Assassinated in Ford's Theater not long after the war ended, by John Wilkes Booth.

19. Andrew Johnson - Became president after Lincoln's assassination. I believe he was impeached, but I may be thinking of someone else.

20. Ulysses S. Grant - Union General during the Civil War. Legendary drinker, supposedly.

21. William H. Taft - Had an affair with Mr Burns' mother. Taft, you old dog. (Alright, I really only know him by name)

22. William McKinley - Assassinated

23. Gerald R. Ford - Became president following Nixon's resignation.

24. George H.W. Bush - Became president following Reagan, made a remark about taxes that came back to haunt him

25. Harry S Truman - President during the Korean War. I could be completely wrong about this, but I seem to remember reading that he adopted S as a middle initial because he didn't have a middle name.

27. George W. Bush - The most recent president before Barack Obama. Often parodied for verbal gaffes, president at the time of 9/11. Military operations during his two terms included the conflict in Iraq and Afghanistan. The election prior to his first term was marred by controversy in Florida.

28. Theodore Roosevelt - The teddy bear takes its name from him. From memory, gave the White House its current name after formerly being known as the Executive Manor.

31. Jimmy Carter - President between Ford and Reagan.

33. Barack Obama - The current president and the first black president of the US. Born in Hawaii.

36. Richard M. Nixon - Elected twice as vice president and president. Resigned in 1976 to avoid impeachment over the Watergate scandal.

37. Lyndon B. Johnson - LBJ. President during the Vietnam War.

38. Franklin D. Roosevelt - Was in poor health during his reign

40. Woodrow Wilson - Suggested a thirteen point plan for moving forward after World War I that was rejected by England and France. Bart uses his name when creating a fake lover for Mrs Krabappel in a third season episode of The Simpsons.

That's about all I know (or think I know).

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Presidents copied and Pasted off a website (benji's order was stupid), although six months ago i could have listed them all in order. We had to memorize them all in Honors US History. Let's see if I've still got my US Presidents as good as I think I do.


1. George Washington 1789-1797 - 1st president

2. John Adams 1797-1801 - 2nd president, helped write Dec. of Independence with Jefferson

3.Thomas Jefferson 1801-1809 - helped write DOI, died on the same day as John Adams, the 50th anniversarry of the DOI signing

4. James Madison 1809-1817 - War of 1812, white house burned down

5. James Monroe 1817-1825 - era of good feelings

6. John Quincy Adams 1825-1829 - John Adam's son

7. Andrew Jackson 1829-1837 - was a dick to Native Americans

8. Martin Van Buren 1837-1841 - economic collapse

9. William Henry Harrison 1841-1841 (Died in Office) - Mr. 30 Day President

10. John Tyler 1841-1845 - the first guy to take over for a dead president, had too many children

11. James K. Polk 1845-1849 - lived in North Carolina and his house is a tourist attraction in Charlotte, where I live

12. Zachary Taylor 1849-1850 - war hero

13. Millard Fillmore 1850-1853 - damn it. can't think of anything

14.Franklin Pierce 1853-1857 - didn't really do much, except escalate the slavery issue

15. James Buchanan 1857-1861 - see above

16. Abraham Lincoln 1861-1865 - hmmmm... don't we all know enough about this guy anyway?

17. Andrew Johnson 1865-1869 - impeached

18. Gen. Ulysses S. Grant 1869-1877 - Civil War general

19. Rutherford B. Hayes 1877-1881 - had a big beard and the most disputed election ever

20. James A. Garfield 1881-(Died in Office) - was shot

21. Chester A. Arthur 1881-1885 - liked pants

22.Grover Cleveland 1885-1889 - was elected twice

23.Benjamin Harrison 1889-1893

24.Grover Cleveland 1893-1897

25. William McKinley 1897-1901

26. Theodore Roosevelt 1901-1909

27.William Howard 1909-1913

28.Woodraw Wilson 1913-1921

29.Warren G. Harding 1921-1923

30.Calvin Coolidge 1923-1929

31.Herbert Hoover 1929-1933

32. Franklin D. Roosevelt 1933-1945

33.Harry S. Truman 1945-1953

34.Dwight D. Eisenhower 1953-1961

35. John F. Kennedy 1961-1963

36.Lyndon B. Johnson 1963-1969

37. Richard M. Nixon 1969-1974

38. Gerald R. Ford 1974-1977

39.Jimmy Carter 1977-1981

40. Ronald Reagan 1981-1989

41.George Bush 1989-1993

42. Bill Clinton 1993-2001

43. George W. Bush 2001-2009

44. Barack Obama 2009-


this is what ive got so far. ill come back to this and finish it later

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I was tempted to post that myself.

Personally surprised you didnt post the "mediocre presidents" number from the simpsons even though you did quote it

Yeah I don't know what to make of the fact that 80% of Andrew's knowledge of American Presidents comes from The Simpsons

Yeah I don't know what to make of the fact that 80% of Andrew's knowledge of American Presidents comes from The Simpsons

Honestly not much. Being the nerd I am I used to do quiz bowl (dont know if you aussies have it. teenagers with buzzers answering trivia questions for bragging rights. Ultimate nerd pursuit) and every once in awhile i'd just come up with these weird ass answers nobody knew how i knew them. The answer was always "The Simpsons" I pissed my coach off one day because i told him i had learned more from watching The Simpsons, South Park, and similar shows than I had from practice.

Hm I may have been the AI of quiz bowl..shit.

(I quit about 2 weeks later despite being the best on my team. Was told to pick basketball or them. They lost)

(I quit about 2 weeks later despite being the best on my team. Was told to pick basketball or them. They lost)

That's a bold ultimatum.

(benji's order was stupid)

Do tell.

27. George W. Bush - ran the US economy to the ground with war spending on the Afghanistan and Iraq wars in response to 9/11

Not true.

18. Abraham Lincoln - reason black people in the States have the liberty to rob white people

What.

27. George W. Bush - shit all over the US economy

Odd that you singled him out when you could have pasted that for almost every single one since Taft.

36. Richard M. Nixon - involved in the Water Gate Scandal, would put him lower on the list

As bad as Watergate, the War on Drugs, wage and price controls, the EPA, CPSC, etc. are they can't compare to the Great Society, Vietnam, looting the Social Security fund for general expenditures and the rest of the failure of a Presidency that LBJ oversaw especially when you factor in Nixon's foreign policy. And neither of the two were anywhere near as bad as the two tyrant assholes and abject failure at the bottom of the list.

19. Andrew Johnson - Became president after Lincoln's assassination. I believe he was impeached, but I may be thinking of someone else.

He was. Along with Clinton the only two President's to be impeached, with neither being convicted.

25. Harry S Truman - President during the Korean War. I could be completely wrong about this, but I seem to remember reading that he adopted S as a middle initial because he didn't have a middle name.

36. Richard M. Nixon - Elected twice as vice president and president. Resigned in 1976 to avoid impeachment over the Watergate scandal.

His entire middle name was just "S." As the parents could not choose between which of two people to name him after.

And Nixon resigned in 1974.

Andrew probably wins so far. And they said The Simpsons would ruin our youth.

1974, that's right. And as we all know, he'll be elected President of Earth in a little under a thousand years after being reanimated as a head in a jar.