A few of my favourites:
One time I was at a small hardware store where the only other occupants were the store's owner and a dad with his young son. The kid picks up a hammer and starts playing with it, the dad sees this, rips it out of the boys hand, and somehow manages to clunk himself in the forehead with the hammer. He dropped like a stack of bricks while the store owner called 911. It was more like an accident, but it seemed pretty stupid at the time.
This was about four years ago. I was sitting in the car waiting for my wife to grab something in a craft store. This woman came out carrying a kid about two and with little girl about six or so behind her. The girl was screaming so much her face was red. She wanted something in the store and the mother had said no. As they were making their way across the lot the six year old picked up a rock and chucked it. Direct hit to the base of the mother's skull. She went down on top of the two year old and wasn't moving.
I ran over to help and possibly call 911 and she started to get up. She thanked me then turned to the six year old. All i could think was how my mom would beat my ass for such a thing. She just looks at the kid and says "You must have really wanted that, lets go back inside and get it for you". Fucking phenomenal.
Today I saw some rather large girl in TIGHT LEATHER PANTS, talking to her VERY large mother about paying someone to dance with her, and how much would be appropriate.
They agreed on $40 (Canadian).
I went hiking at the Greenbelt today (it's a nature preserve inside the city limits) and on my way back I passed a couple hiking to one of the waterfalls. The man was carrying a tiny backpack, his 5'6 wife/girlfriend was dragging the cooler full of beer. The cooler got stuck on a root, which somehow managed to make her fall, spilling some of the beer.
He was a real gentleman though. He ran over and picked up the 2 cans that fell out, while glaring at me as I walked by. His wife had to get up on her own.
