Yo Momma

[8-Hype]

I have seen that show yesterday on MTV Base, and I have to say I like it a lot, though it is pretty simple and brief. What I don't like very much, however, is the host who has an engrained Spanish accent.

Link

"Your house is so small... if you order a large pizza, you have to eat it outside." That joke was the best for me yesterday, performed by C-Jay.

[cklitsie]

To be honest, the show sucks. It's all about who memorized the most 'yo momma' kinda jokes, nothing on there is really original. And the jokes about each other's rooms and stuff aren't funny at all.

"Your front teeth are so big, when you sneeze there's a hole in your chest."

[jerry]

i watched that at my friends house... yeah its funny to watch the host in real life outside of 70s' show.
there was one where this girl "v" said "your momma is so hairy she's got an afro on her nipple"

[Doobie]

Your momma's such a slut her pussy has more friends then tom on myspace. . It's a funny show at times, but at other times even I feel embaressed for the people.

[hipn]

This show sucks big balls.

[bigh0rt]

The show, its premise, and everything surrounding this show scream, "I'm an idiot and I suck."

[BIG GREEN]

Wilmer Valderama is a pretensive boy band member rejected faggot. With that said, the show is hilarious...especially that episode with the 50's announcer mimicing white guy.

[J@3]

This is the worst show ever. Wilmer Valderamma and his shitty accent drive me insane, not to mention the spastics they get to compete. "Yo momma's so fat................. she overweight!!" crowd: "OHHHHHHHHH!!" while Wilmer jumps around like a retarded ethnic gnome.

[-BHZMAFIA-]

Wilmer Valderiantreaitnamma is gay? He really acts like and I was thinking he was gay the entire show. The show is lame as hell, but there are a few jokes on there that were actually funny though. And I hate how everytime the winner gets their money, he has to say "a $1000 in cash money", thats what got me thinking he was gay. Damn queer.

[Dro]

Some of you guys are not giving JJ enough credit. He's one of the smoothest shooters in the league. Good defender, good athlete. This guy is going to be the leader of an Atlanta team that's eventually going to be damn good.

[Gundy]

Wrong thread dude.

[j.23]

i wish i was wilmer valderrama, he took mandy moore's virginity. lucky mexican bastard.

[Gundy]

He might have taken Linday Lohan's virginity too (she's so slutty that I doubt he did) What's so great about this guy?

[j.23]

He might have taken Linday Lohan's virginity too (she's so slutty that I doubt he did) What's so great about this guy?

apparently he has an 8 inch penis.

[cyanide]

What's so great about this guy?

Assuming j.23 was just joking around, I think it's just his accent and exotic ethnicity that woos the ladies.

No, forget that. I think j.23's onto something here.

[j.23]

Wilmer Valderrama was on the Howard Stern show this morning & my God! The dude let it all out. Because he had a very humble upbringing in Venezuela, he knows he’s very fortunate, so taking that into account, Wilmer uses & abuses his position to land the hottest chicks around—something any one of us would do if given the opportunity.

Anyway, I’ll shut up & let MarksFriggin’ take over the show. I’ve grabbed the best bits from this morning’s show for our archives, but you can read the entire show over here.

* Download an MP3 of Valderrama’s Confessional Session!

First, Wilmer Valderama has had sex w/ the following women….:

1. Venezuelan whores when he was 14 & still in Venezuela
2. Ariana Richard
3. Lindsay Lohan
4. Mandy Moore
5. Ashlee Simpson
6. Jennifer Love Hewitt
7-150. Random bartenders, strippers, waitresses & whoever likes money, Venezuelan schlongs & fame!

Venezuelan Women

Wilmer said that when he was down in Venezuela, around the age of 14, he was able to get laid. He had sex before he left there. Howard asked him if he was getting any girls during the high school years. He said he was always trying to figure out how he was going to be able to get a cup of coffee. He joined a theater department in school and eventually went on to get some commercial work.

Lindsay Lohan

Howard said that Wilmer dated Lindsay Lohan so Artie figured that he must have taken her virginity. Wilmer said he just met her like last year. He’s also dated Ashlee Simpson so Artie figured he must have banged her as well. Fred was playing some porn clips of a woman screaming and Wilmer said that it was louder than that.

Howard asked him if Lindsay’s boobs are real. Wilmer said that they are. Artie asked him what it’s like to see his dick disappearing into those tits. Wilmer said it’s pretty amazing actually.

Howard asked Wilmer if Lindsay was anorexic when he was dating her. He said that she lost the weight after they dated so she wasn’t like that when he was with her. Howard asked her if she had the bright red hair down below. Wilmer said that she didn’t have any hair down there and she really pampered herself. He said that she was one of the best girls that he’s had in bed too. Artie asked him if he thinks that she’s a shittier actor or singer. Howard and Wilmer think that she’s a good actress. Wilmer said that she’s a very talented girl.

Mandy Moore

Howard read that Wilmer also dated Mandy Moore. After every name that Howard mentioned, Artie would say ‘’You fucked ___?!'’ He’s nailed a lot of hot chicks from what they can tell. Howard asked him if he got Mandy when he was doing ‘’That 70’s Show.'’ Wilmer said that the moral of the story is that everyone should get a sitcom because that’s how all of this went down. He told Howard that Mandy is a very attractive girl.

Wilmer told the guys how he met Mandy Moore. He said that they were each other’s first loves so Howard figured he took her virginity. He wanted a high five from Wilmer when he heard that. He said he’s never taken the virginity of any woman so he doesn’t know what that’s like. Artie said that the closest he came was being a girl’s 14th. Wilmer said that he’s a huge fan of the show and he’s a bit star struck sitting in the studio this morning.

Wilmer said that he met Mandy and told her that she was good looking and that brought the room to a stop because no one talks to her like that. He said he went to pick her up at the hotel and her mother told him that she had changed her shirt 3 times already. He took her out to eat at and took it from there.

Random Bullshit:

Howard read that Wilmer is going to be in a remake of CHiPs playing the part of Ponch. Howard said he might have to come down to the set and hang out with him sometime. Howard asked him to do a quick F, Marry, Kill game. Here are the names he gave him and what Wilmer said he would do…

Lindsay Lohan - F
Mandy Moore - Marry
Jessica Alba - Kill
Howard changed it up and asked him what he would do if he gave him girls that he’s actually slept with…
Lindsay Lohan - Marry
Mandy Moore - F
Jennifer Love Hewitt - Kill
Artie said that the right answer is that you’d F all of them and marry none of them. Howard said that he wanted to stick Wilmer out in the green room with Jillian Grace and Pilar Lastra to see how long it would take him to get laid. Artie said it shouldn’t take too long to get Jillian since she’ll probably sleep with anyone who’s in SAG.

[J@3]

I have a hard time believing he fucked Jennifer Love Hewitt, the others I can buy.

[j.23]

i believe it. she's not as hot as she once used to be, she's fallen off ... BAD!

[8-Hype]

He might have taken Linday Lohan's virginity too (she's so slutty that I doubt he did) What's so great about this guy?

apparently he has an 8 inch penis.

Oh, so you also had sex with him?

[Its_asdf]

Apparently is the key word in that sentence.

I'm pretty sure he didn't have sex, just some good 'ol teabaggin'.

I couldn't resist bringing that up again