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Other video games, TV shows, movies, general chit-chat...this is an all-purpose off-topic board where you can talk about anything that doesn't have its own dedicated section.
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fart

Wed May 10, 2006 10:24 pm

I started this topic cause it seems that anyone can make a topic about anything and it will instantly become a 40 reply topic. As long as it looks like it induces some sort of cognitivity. We has humans use our brains to think and to type on forums. fart. We then use our ass to fart...why fart? It's just to slabs of meat that come together and flap to spew out gas. I feel like shitting right now but i won't go right away cause i keep trying to think of new things to add to this wonderful thread. Opinions on this topic is greatly appreciated because my mother told me growing up that if we don't fart..we'll die. Which was her constant excuse for being quite disgusting. I dont tolerate the women i date farting around me though...it turns me off. It's an instant boner killer.

Shitting out the ass

If i fill my post with underlined topics...then it looks more professional. It's this porported, ostencious formatting professionalism that helps even the most mundane topics to have 2 pages in 2 seconds there. I'm trying to make a long topic but i don't have the tolerancy to make a short story essay like most of you do...let alone read them. Sorry but i get bored really quickly..and i'm already bored typing all of this. It's already been five minutes and this is all i can come up with. fart. There i just did it again. I wish i didnt have to cause it hurts my nose. Don't get me wrong, i love how our community is thriving with hundreds of peoploe posting everyday..but we should have a toilet on the forum. Why do you ask? For to make shitting in ofcourse.. why else? A place we can flush all the stupid spam n00bs..and spam topics like this one straight to the perverbial septic tank. Which leads me to my other point: why call it a septic tank? I thought septic meant "no germs"....or is that "asepsis"? I should know this considering in in medical school though. Now on to the topic: i shit out of my ass...do you?

Society

Making topics about the social and ethical problems that people as whole enduce due to various reasons is always a great header. That way when i shit...and fart..it wont stink that much. fart. I call my little sister poop-stink cause she farts all the time..even during her sleep. It doesn't really matter though cause this is a long fucking post and most people won't read it anyway. Only those people with the opulent ability to use proper grammer and vocabulary on the forum. This is a good way to weed out the stupid n00bs from the members who actually go to school.

What are your opinions on fart?




Disclaimer: This was a satirical post and should not be taken seriously.

Wed May 10, 2006 10:34 pm

Opinions based on subjective research and analysis

Wikipedia describes the act of farting as "Flatulence is the presence of a mixture of gases known as flatus produced by symbiotic bacteria and yeasts living in the gastrointestinal tract of mammals. Flatulence is released under pressure through the anus. Releasing flatulence is colloquially known as farting. The phenomenon of farting may be comprised by both auditory and olfactory components." I agree with you that these long posts involving letter formatting and the bolding of headings does weed out the shit posters, they usually respond with something like "I agree" or "This place is getting philosphical". The reason being their minute brains can't comprehend anything over 5 lines and this forum remains their own personal MSN conversation. Obviously having actual MSN, along with AIM where they continue to spread their illiterate rambling to other illiterate ramblers who somehow consider them friends isn't good enough, as they must do it here and make things difficult for those of us who actually have a brain. That being said, it is quite funny that all of these interesting topics are showing up right after Matthew criticised the state of the forum, it seems the spammers have become scared and run away.

Increasing physiological breakthroughs in human development

By inserting multi-syllabic words into my underlined, bolded headline I have cut the amount of people reading this post by half. I suspect that number will reduce even further as they scroll to the quick reply and give us a "Yea I agree", "Wow great thread guys" or "Ye. So ye. Kool.". This increases their amazing post count numbers which for most of these people is already way past the 1,000 mark and in some cases up past 3,000.

Wed May 10, 2006 10:57 pm

I hopes this wasn't a knock on me. :(

Thu May 11, 2006 6:11 am

nah it's not. Just having a little fun....read the disclaimer. (y)

Re: fart

Thu May 11, 2006 7:25 am

Yohance Bailey wrote: Opinions on this topic is greatly appreciated because my mother told me growing up that if we don't fart..we'll die. Which was her constant excuse for being quite disgusting.


That reminds me of that South Park episode when they said that if you hold in your farts, you'll internally combust. They eventually decided that you should fart in moderation. :lol:

So how'd your shit go? Did it all come out smoothly? I prefer to poop rather than fart because I can always feel the gas in my stomach.

Thu May 11, 2006 7:58 am

As long as this doesn't end up as one of those threads with a shit-load ( :wink: ) of pictures, I'll be happy.


I love to fart.

Re: fart

Thu May 11, 2006 8:16 am

The Black Death wrote:
Yohance Bailey wrote: Opinions on this topic is greatly appreciated because my mother told me growing up that if we don't fart..we'll die. Which was her constant excuse for being quite disgusting.


That reminds me of that South Park episode when they said that if you hold in your farts, you'll internally combust. They eventually decided that you should fart in moderation. :lol:

So how'd your shit go? Did it all come out smoothly? I prefer to poop rather than fart because I can always feel the gas in my stomach.


That also reminds me of the south park episode where they shove food up their ass and shit from their mouth.. Quite disgusting, but funny at the same time.

Thu May 11, 2006 10:55 am

I must admit, this place is getting rather philosophical.

I'm sorry to disappoint, but it wasn't the long winded post or grammar that kept me from reading, but the contents instead. After reading the first line or two, I became disinclined to continue, fearful that I might discover a disgusting anecdote. The imminence of a bowel excretion recital was more than I dared to read.

Thu May 11, 2006 11:23 am

It seems everywhere I go on this forum there are complaints about spamming noobs. Getting kinda tired if you ask me. Its like the new bandwagon: "Gee, I am cool because I complain about spamming noobs who only give one-liners." This isnt a knock on anyone but complaining or restating out the obvious wont really change anything. Oh well. I'm a spammer so it might just be that my feelings are hurt.

Thu May 11, 2006 11:54 am

I think farting is an indication that you need to shit. And if you cant shit due to your location you start fart and fart and it smells bad.

It feels great to fart loud. I fart loud when im all by my self and with my close friends w/c do the same just for laughs. :mrgreen:

puuuuuuuutttttttt.... ahhhh, feels good! :mrgreen:




.................

For me, I reply when i want to reply and if i need to reply and want to state my opinion. Im on-line almost 8hrs a day and i just browse and browse the forum. :D

Thu May 11, 2006 12:23 pm

I love to rip one in the middle of class when we are doing silent reading or something. That is always a classic.

Thu May 11, 2006 1:32 pm

People who actually read text in the thread before posting:

dadamafia
Axel
Jackal

That is all.

Thu May 11, 2006 2:09 pm

Jae wrote:People who actually read text in the thread before posting:

dadamafia
Axel
Jackal

That is all.


I don't read threads anymore, the new NLSC is rotting my brain. Too many intelligent threads. What happened to Coolmac!?! :x :x

Thu May 11, 2006 8:07 pm

I like how there's always complaints about spammers. Then when people try to put into an effort, satirical posts like Yohance's pop up. :P

Is there any in-between?

I hopes this wasn't a knock on me.

I could be wrong but i'd say Tuomas's thread was the main factor. It seemed very cliche and forced to me. (Though, that's not to say it was bad. Points for effort. Heck, i'm one of those people Jae mentioned with a brain too minute. So i'm not one to talk.)

I can't remember why i wrote this post. Oh yeah. *farts*

Fri May 12, 2006 6:48 am

I read the whole thing, but I didn't know what to say. :crazy:

Image

"I fart in your general direction"
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