Hollywood is Making 'Battleship' into a Movie, Seriously

[Jeffx]

with Rihanna, no less. I smell epic FAIL.

http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/164448 ... anna.jhtml

[J@3]

How on Earth do you turn a board game like this into a movie? I'm guessing it'll just be some strategic naval thing, will suck absolutely. Can't wait for Lady Gaga to star in Connect Four.

[shadowgrin]

naval officers assigned to a multinational task force charged with repelling alien invaders

Sounds exciting!

[benji]

How on Earth do you turn a board game like this into a movie? I'm guessing it'll just be some strategic naval thing, will suck absolutely. Can't wait for Lady Gaga to star in Connect Four.

Close but alas you forgot a key component of a bad big budget Hollywood film:

At sea, a Naval fleet must protect Earth from extraterrestrial invaders.

IIRC, someone bought the film rights to Ouija, Risk and Stratego too. And Ridley Scott is directing the film version of Monopoly. Hasbro sold all these rights after Transformers made a zillion dollars and G.I. Joe didn't bomb.

They're also making another Clue movie, as if you could top the original.

[Andrew]

Yeah, think I'll give this one a miss.

[Jackal]

Move over Christopher Nolan, these movies are why people still go to theatres.

[benji]

What they should do is make it a standard naval war movie full of special effects, and then at the end there's a giant battle and people are gettin blown apart, their body parts ripped apart, the ships exploding in the worst possible ways, then one of the battleships gets torn apart and starts sinking. And there's this one sailor who is the main character and he's on that battleship and he looks into the camera with tears clutching a picture frame as it sinks.

Then you hear this like seven year old yell out "you sunk my battleship!" And it zooms out and it's just some kids playing the board game.

Then the doorbell rings, and the mom answers it and there's a guy from the Navy standing there and she bursts into tears. And it cuts to black.

You could do the same thing for Risk or Stratego too.

[Oznogrd]

What they should do is make it a standard naval war movie full of special effects, and then at the end there's a giant battle and people are gettin blown apart, their body parts ripped apart, the ships exploding in the worst possible ways, then one of the battleships gets torn apart and starts sinking. And there's this one sailor who is the main character and he's on that battleship and he looks into the camera with tears clutching a picture frame as it sinks.

Then you hear this like seven year old yell out "you sunk my battleship!" And it zooms out and it's just some kids playing the board game.

Then the doorbell rings, and the mom answers it and there's a guy from the Navy standing there and she bursts into tears. And it cuts to black.

not only would i pay to see that movie, i'd show it to traumatize children in my future classes

[air gordon]

something like this has been done already but was awesome

"global thermonuclear war"

it's a shame that alex skaaaaarrssgggaard *from true blood* is involving himself in this movie

[benji]

WarGames and Mastermind were both awesome.

And they inspired me to make the pitch I made above.

[shadowgrin]

YOU SUNK MY BATTLESHIP!

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HAHAHAHAHA. It's Transformers at sea! HAHAHAHAHA.

Liam Neeson at least will make this crap watchable.

[Dc311]

I'm waiting for Hungry Hungry Hippos to be made.