Jae's Weekly NLSC Stuff (Ep. 7) I have mis-placed my pants..

This is the first edition of Jae's Weekly NLSC Stuff on it's new day of Thursday! Wait... I did one on Thursday before didn't I? Shit. Shut up. Anyways it's not late, and that's all that matters... even though it is late, because I only decided to move it to Thursday due to that but that's all irrelevant. We're in like ONYX at a gay club...

NEEWWSSSS

Pretty eventful week don't you think? First the ever girlfriend-like Naomi starts posting, and is subsequentially met by the ever wigger-like Matt. So within the first days of posting "Wuddup G ima tap dat ass boii" was the first impression of the NLSC. Nevermind that, we'll move on and meet some nicer people. Oh look, it's JoeBuddah! He's always a pleasant chap... what's he got to say then? "Get back in the kitchen bitch"... well, nice talking to you too. And we wonder why girls don't post here more often Either ways, the insuing flame war and Joe's slow but painful venture into insanity meant he was banned, deleted and verbally raped before he could say "Woman beater". It gave us some excitement, and hey, who doesn't like a thread called "It's all about the breasts" getting 4 pages worth of replies?

Secondly, we had a bit of an influx... an unfortunate influx, but an influx all the rest. These creatures came to us in the night, they stormed the forums with reckless abandon and wreaked havoc on not only the NLSC posters but also the English language in general. These beasts were ruthless, constructing sentences out of words that haven't even been created yet, and throwing exclamation marks into the middle, beginning and end of all of their posts. No one knew what to do, we couldn't run, we couldn't hide we just had to absorb the punishment and hope that our children, and our children's children don't end up with single digit IQ's. These people are commonly known as "Filipino's", and they should be feared. Note: This isn't a "diss" on that particular nation, I like 99% of the Filipino posters here.

POSTER OF THE WEEK

I've made a decision. From now on I'll be giving this award out for both General Talk AND NBA Talk. I figured it won't be too difficult, and there's alot of good guys that post at NBA Talk but don't talk at General Talk and visa ve... no... just that. Either way, the award for NBA Talk goes to...

TheCambyManVol3

Probably the best poster on NBA Talk, well no probably's about it... even if he doesn't share my Oscar Robertson admiration. He also posts a bit on General Talk, and did a fantastic job with the bannings of random idiots over the last few weeks. If it wasn't for Matthew, we'd still have 70% of the "test tube leftovers" running around posting their illiterate ramblings than we would if M-Pac wasn't e-killing them. Likes to have discussions on the NBA and generally finds an opposing opinion in basically anything people post but it's one of the main things that keep that forum section alive. Congrats Matthew, the rest of you Joking joking

And for General Talk...

Jona2112

After returning from holidays, Jona got right back into the swing of things by posting some cool pictures from a Lakers game and subsequentially wracking up COOLmac-like numbers with GOAT-like quality. Not that the two are the similar, but Jona is definitely one of the main reasons General Talk is so good to post in these days. He's also friendly and welcoming to people around the forums plus I'm yet to see him be negative to anyone at all, congrats on your second Poster Of The Week award Jona

RANDOM LIST: TOP 3 THINGS YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW ABOUT...

3: Jowe
After winning the "Grumpiest User" award, Jowe's reputation as being an asshole seemed to escalate slightly. What people might not know about Mr. Pham, is that he's not actually grumpy at all. He always seems happy and optimistic about something or another, even Centrelink I don't want to ruin his image or anything, but Jowe's not exactly "King Of The Burns" on MSN either in his own words "I'm going back to the NLSC forums, where I dish out the insults instead of absorbing them". That being said, don't add him to MSN. He doesn't like you... yes, you.

2: Homer
When Homer inexplicably joined the RateMyBody.com internet dating site, he sent out numerous messages to young women making proposals to them of varying sorts. Some of these involved things such as "Hey baby !!! I know u think I sexy !!! And ty !!!" and "I am Homer !!! U want sex me now !!!". The responses varied from "Fuck off moron" to "Maybe, let's talk some more" (seriously, that was one of them)... don't ask me how I know these things, I just do.

1: Andrew
Most old time NLSC'ers know this, but it's a well hidden fact that "when he wants to be" (i.e, on MSN) Andrew is one of the funnier people you'll meet. Having to stay professional and such on the forums, Count Beggsula doesn't really get "unleashed" until after-hours. As said before, don't add him to MSN to find out... it's one of those things you'll just have to take my word for. Speaking of 'words', Andrew is yet to venture into the World of e-gangsta's... that of course is the next step for the A-Bomb, with Ghamed gone and all they might need a replacement.

OLD SCHOOL VS NEW SCHOOL COMPARISON

This is something I'll continue to do every now and then, it's one of the things I enjoy more actually...

Liam vs The G.O.A.T.

POST QUALITY: It's hard to split these two. Admittedly Liam was a bit older than GOAT so obviously having that 3 years or so experience might've made a difference. That being said, GOAT is one of the smarter 5 year olds you'll ever meet so it's quite hard to judge between the two on this one. Advantage: Even

SOCIAL CIRCLE: I've never spoken to GOAT outside the NLSC, but I've really got no idea who he associates with from the forums, if anyone at all. Can't blame him I guess, you're all losers Liam on the other hand was friends with virtually everyone from Ben to Basore... well maybe not, but close enough. Advantage: Liam

OUTSIDE THE NLSC: This is where it gets a bit interesting... Liam was fairly quiet about his life outside the NLSC, as most of us should've been to start with I guess, but the one thing that remained consistant was this girl he had a crush on but couldn't work up the courage to say anything to her. GOAT on the other hand has been more open about what goes on in his life, from bashing up racists to going out with "hot" 13 year old girls with nice asses. Advantage: GOAT

CONCLUSION: This one is pretty close, in the sense that they're both young quality posters... although Liam's quite a bit older now, he's all grown up but comparing the two in their hey-day, GOAT now and Liam 3 years ago, it's really just come down to one thing. Something I've always remembered about Liam, is that he avoided flame wars whenever possible but when someone gave him no option but to flame he absolutely killed them. He never lost a flame war and always won them really really convincingly, so taking that into account I've got to give this matchup to Liam.

TOOL OF THE WEEK

This was all set to go to either Shep/Rip/Matt or whoever, but that was until I logged in today and found a PM from a particular person... you see this person is no stranger to TOTW, and this person is no stranger and not a stranger to being a complete wanker either... that person sealed his fate with the following PM... (yes, he did spell it "person abpve you")

From: ONYX
To: Jae™
Posted: Thu Mar 03, 2005 5:43 am
Subject: Person Abpve you

You're a funny guy Jae, but you don't have to demonstrate me your "power" (well, you would like to call it like that though). I don't fear you at all, and in the topic "Person Above You" it was just another try to blame me, you wanna make the scapegoat of me in front of the others (If it was up to you, you would blame me for everything). You just want to influence their minds, and the product should be that the minds are directed AGAINST me. You wanna confront the others with me? Nice try, but it didn't work that time. And don't try that again, please.

wtf? Wanker Seriously stop being such a dipshit, I'm really not sure how intelligent you are but anyone with half a brain would've shut up a long time ago. I don't care enough about you to turn people against you, in fact, most people think you're a wanker without me doing anything. Get a grip, no one cares.

Anyways because that's a short TOTW, here's another token Asian (or whatever)...

Hello fox!

i have released a patch that i maid all day!
i hope its going to be cool because it has the facts of the NBA.COM site!!

you fu**ing retard if i wiil see one more curse i swear that i will come to your house and kick your ass יבן זונה תדבר יפה כי אני יזיין אותך יחתיכת הומו אוכל בתחת ואני מקווה שהבנת את זה!

that was in hebrew you fu**ing retard !

and about the patch !

i want to ask you andrew something how do you make ratings!?
cause i looked in the nba.com site and i have seen that you have some rating to change so i released my patch and i dont understand why u r hangry i didnt do with that nothing i ve hust changed the rating as they sould be!

end of story!

OK

hes never sould open that i have just come home from school and i ve saw that crap!

i dont want to see it anymore casue i though this is agood forum but all i get is
shit!

but look i want to create but i dont know how and all the guides here suck!
i dont understant what to do their!!!

so if somebody can help me but real help not some got deam link to some stupied guide!

i would like to talk in icq if somebody got please!

TOP 6 BURNS OF THE WEEK

Quick note: After this week, it will be very very very difficult for a burn directed at TOOLmac to be taken into consideration for BOTW. The reason for this is that it becomes too easy after a while, and he doesn't respond either so why bother?

6: air gordon @ I_hate_Bill_Walton

Can be found here.

wow you burned him! here's a thumb up the ass , you attention seeking whore

5: Jowe @ COOLmac

Can be found here.

can we all go back to the breast topic.
the jokes has to be in the joke thread

Well you were the one who posted a joke in this thread you test-tube left over.

4: TheCambyManVol3 @ dweaver99077

Can be found here.

As long as there are people in this forum who call others "retards" just by reading a few of their posts, you BET I'll be right here repeting myself. Case closed.

Shut up, retard. You're not in court

3: Naomi @ JoeBuddah

Can be found here.

Seriously just cause you're a low life pathetic loser who has no real reason to exist and nothing that even resembles the female form would ever go near you, screwing your mum and calling her "your girl", that's just NOT justified

No I'm not being bias, you find me one female poster who's ever burnt a guy so badly...

2: COOLmac @ himself

Can be found here.

yo-yo's? That defies Section 3 Paragraph 12 of the Jaeland act against Fun and Games

that one was superb.
and this is not even a joke thread.

the JOKE thread

1: TheCambyManVol3 @ Matt/Shep/Rip

Can be found here.

jack nicholsons love child telling me i have no taste

That post was so unlike you matt, but so similar to your alter ego just like your ip addresses! (click the picture for regular size)



Good luck denying this you fucking retard.

As I said this'll probably be the last week where we feature COOLmac burns, unless it's something really good... although I think most of the good ones are gone now.

NLSC POWER RANKINGS

Bit different this week, I'm going to "trial" cutting the power rankings down to 5 instead of 10... just to streamline it a bit, we'll see how it goes...

1: cyanide (Last Week: 1, No Movement)
Continues to impress, and is slowly but surely taking the #1 spot on the power rankings and making it his own. After last weeks mammoth efforts I thought cyanide might drop off a bit but it hasn't happened, and General Talk is better off for it. The only blip this week was his breast talk with Naomi (:lol:) but otherwise cyanide was as solid as ever and continues to post without spamming at all, I swear I thought it was impossible to post this much and not spam but apparentely not. If I'm not mistaken this is also the first time someone's held onto the #1 spot for more than 1 week.

2: Jowe (Last Week: 2, No Movement)
Came very very close to dis-lodging cyanide from the number 1 spot this week, but only just lost out to a re-count of sorts. He himself admitted he'd put cyanide as 1 and him at 2, so it just goes to show that when he's not busy releasing "jersey previews" or burning COOLmac Jowe also has a heart As long as he keeps posting it seems highly unlikely Jowe will drop out of the top 10, ignoring the fact he's neglecting his duties as a .org cronie I think General Talk is better off having Jowe be as active as he is.

3: Jona2112 (Last Week: Unranked)
Jona dropped right out of the top 10 after his holidays meant he didn't post at all, but not only did he start where he left off he even progressed from the level he was posting at before. Looking back, Jona could easily break into the top 2 and this week was a genuine shot at being #1. The sheer fact that Jona can combine mass posting numbers with good contributions and decent quality means that he'll rarely be out of the top 5 when active.

4: Nick (Last Week: Unranked)
After his weeks of bitching about not making the power rankings, Nick finally makes an appearance and comes straight in at number 4. Admittedly I was a bit harsh for keeping him out of the rankings for so long, I mean the 0 posts per week he made were all quality and I wouldn't mind seeing more posts like it All jokes aside, I like seeing his thick purple... er... writing appear on the screen, and like Jowe he's better off over here on the "light side". With school and all of that unnecessary stuff building up behind him, it'll be interesting to see if Nick can keep this level of activity up, but that being said we know he doesn't really mind things building behind him...

5: The G.O.A.T. (Last Week: 4, Down 1)
Little bit quieter than normal this week, but with alot of good posters stepping up and being more active GOAT did well not to get lost in the rush. Most people are still shocked that a 9 year old can be such a good poster, and I can honestly say I've never seen nor spoken to anyone his age who's this intelligent. Has been doing some good work with sigs recently too, most of the good NBA-related ones around the forum were made by GOAT and it's just a testament of why parents should teach their kids computer skills before they turn 5. Don't worry GOAT, I'm sure the moustache you don't have anymore made you look older than you are

ON THE BRINK
TheCambyManVol3
Null17
DoobieKnicks
IndyPacers67
Cammo

If this was a top 10 you guys would've made it... special mention, Naom§

Anyways that ends this week's episode, next week should be better but if you don't like it Any more suggestions just tell me, and what number do you think's ideal for the power rankings?

Great edition this week, Jae, and I hope you're still not with me

As for a suggestion, I still like the top 10 rather than top 5, but that might be asking for too much, since you're already putting in a lot of effort in these editions.

I kinda feel sorry for IndyPacers67, the guy's always on the brink, so I'll give him a special mention.

ya'll still cant prove anything about me being this shep/rip dude

damn Jae, when i got in the top15, the following week you cut the list down to 10. last week i got in the top10, now you cut the list to 5.

hehehe, nice list. i know it's kinda hard doing this every week.you almost didn't make one this week.

Hehe, fact that people take this stuff as the bible of the NLSC is what spooks me. 7 Episodes already, impressive stuff Jae. Props to you for continueing it so long.

Matt should've been the tool of the week, Onyx is too stupid to even be a tool anymore, he's just too damn stoopid.

No, I'm not back, dont PM me.

@Jackal and Jae: Very funny. Just don't f### with me and I won't say your damn name. You're both permanently trying to blame me and offend me too much. I don't really care, t's only a forum.

P.S.: You're very original with TOTW!

I'm going for an ONYX full mental breakdown by Episode 12.

Btw, with the Power Rankings... the real reason I cut it down to 5 was because I only had another 5 mins to type it all out before I got kicked off the computer, next week we'll be back to top 10. I feel sorry for IndyPacers aswell, he definitely deserves a top 10 spot this week.

:lol: I'm going for an ONYX full mental breakdown by Episode 12.

hehe,i`m waiting

nice stuff....

Great work Jae, you really keep a good overall view of the forums, and very objective too (no Naomi in the power rankings! )

Keep it up please, it's so funny every week.

love it. great stuff again. keep it up.

TheCambyManVol3 @ dweaver99077 should have been No. 1 burn of the week. that one was fucking hilarious.

btw, im dying to see that mental breakdown, should be some interesting stuff

Great work Jae, you really keep a good overall view of the forums, and very objective too (no Naomi in the power rankings! )

Yep, he would never do that because he's not biased.

No I'm not being bias

But, then again...

... special mention, Naom§

Awww, how sweet!


EDIT: Well, I'll be damned, this is a milestone post. 1000 posts. And I waste it on this [expletive]?

hey, no burns in burns of the week topics

Great issue, even though I have no clue who Liam is. BTW the reason I was quieter this week was my vacation.

Great work again Jae, I haven't been active at all this week and probably won't be for another 2 weeks. As I've exceeded my download limit thus my internet is running at 64K speed

well you can get the retro feeling of he good old 56k modem

YAY!!! POTW in General Talk!!
I hope I have time to post now that school started but, hey thanks Jae!

Come on Cy, do a 1000th post thread!! PLEEEEASE!!!!

good work jae but wheres my special mention lol joking

Yup im really liking your weekly thread jae , it 's amazing how i almost cracked the top 5 , Well I'll continue to be active and hopefully make your power ranking and /or burn list (no i wont make problems on purpose) Take care for now and im just waiting for episode 8.

Thanks for leaving me out of it again.

These things just keep going down hill.

This shit's tight.

good read jae

i really liked the breakdown of liam vs. the goat.

thanks cyanide and jae too, no need to feel sorry. its all gravy

Come on Cy, do a 1000th post thread!! PLEEEEASE!!!!

lol, thanks, but no thanks. I don't have anything to say about my 1000th, really, and I already gave up my 1000th in this thread. I don't need to give shoutouts because (almost) everyone here has my respect

Jae™

i always want to do that to the man

You can respect me

A nice way of making 17 year olds to suck up to you...