*Girl problem* No, I'm not Emo.

[shadowgrin]

I need help, opinions, or ideas.

*Long read, here it goes*

I once tried to court this girl but I was turned down. She was mad at me for sometime because I somewhat made her confused (she had a boyfriend then but I didn't care, if I like a girl I go for it). We reconciled over time so I tried for the second time, and got turned down again. I really didn't bother asking her to elaborate the reason, but we still remained in good terms unlike the first time.

I just found out recently that she is sick. I know it's possible for any girl her age to have it, but I find it hard to imagine that she would have that sickness. During the course of our conversation she asked me this question "If you know you only have 5 years to live, would you still bother pursuing your dreams and ambitions?" In my mind I was like "WTF?" My answer was that I will still do the things I do everyday and maybe have more appreciation for the little things in life or just go through the motions.
At the end she said that she doesn't want to undergo any form of treatment or medication, and that she just wants to die.

I cracked up some jokes by telling her some possible scenarios for her funeral. She still managed to laugh behind her tears, I almost cried myself (my eyes just swelled) and told her to stop crying because I'm also on the verge of tears. She found it funny the way I pleaded to her (maybe because she doesn't imagine me as the "crying" type of guy). She confided that of all the people she talked regarding her condition, the conversation we had was the only one that made her laugh.

The deal is, I'm not going to stand idly by while she waits for her life to end. I want to comfort her and make her laugh despite her ordeal, but if I do that she might misinterpret my intentions as another pathetic attempt to court her again. She might get mad at me again and that's the last thing I want considering her condition. This may or may not be about love or compassion but I figured doing nothing is the worse thing I could do.

Should I go for it, or not and just let her be?

*Don't bother asking what her condition is, I'm not going to say it out of respect for her.*

[cyanide]

If she takes the laughs despite of her condition as positive, then you should definitely keep humor in her life regardless of how she might misinterpret your attempt to court her. That's not the point, she's dying, and you're there for her by comforting her and making her laugh. If she sees this, then she'll know it's for that reason.

If she does misinterpret it as an attempt to court her, then tell her straight out that you're not doing this to court her, but to bring joy in her life by being there for her.

[Matt]

exactly what Cy said.

tought situation for her though, damn.

[Jackal]

I didn't read it, but whenever there are girl problems, you should just proceed to rape them with a knife. If she's a virgin, take a toothpick.

I will read it later & provide you with my Dr. Phil type insight that might, or might not involve anal combustion.

Ah, suspense.

[Raps13]

^^ u will regret making that post once u read it

[Jackal]

Not really, I'm quite turned on by it.

Edit: Just read it. Made me go quite flacid.

In other news, damn that sucks for her. Kind of weird she's asking you if you'd pursue your dreams & ambitions given you're not dying.

Now to make sense of why she told or more specifically she asked you that.

A) She wanted you to know she's dying.
B) She's seeking a bit of attention.
C) You're dying.

I think she wanted you to know she's dying otherwise she wouldn't have shared that question with you. I think she feels quite comfortable letting you know her life may not be as long as normal folks would imagine life to be.

Myself thinks that that on its own is an invitation to accompany her in these testing times that lie ahead. That sounds kind of weird without dramatic or sentimental background music but you get where I'm going with it.

Be the best friend you can be to her.

[Jing]

hm... u are a transexual. XD

[J@3]

hm... u are a transexual. XD

What the fuck

[shadowgrin]

^^ u will regret making that post once u read it

Meh, that's the type of post I would expect from Riot though.

Myself thinks that that on its own is an invitation to accompany her in these testing times that lie ahead. That sounds kind of weird without dramatic or sentimental background music but you get where I'm going with it.

Yep I get it, and don't worry there's no dramatic or sentimental music going in my head right now.

As for cyanide's post, . Thanks.

tought situation for her though, damn.

I'm planning to convince her to accept the treatment and medication, if all goes well.

hm... u are a transexual. XD

Now WTF does that mean? Your post is more weird than Jackal's.

I'm planning to buy her a stuffed toy for her birthday this week. I'm going to get a panda, unless you guys have a better idea?
I can't find that "Godzilla" stuffed toy that Jae has.

[Jackal]

Calm down dudes, with the transsexual comment, he's referring to my signature.

[shadowgrin]

How does it feel to be a transsexual?

*Great, I just ruined my own thread. Go me!*

[Its_asdf]

If she's going to die, then what's the point of trying to "court" her? Just stay by her side and be a true friend.

[Riot]

*Don't bother asking what her condition is, I'm not going to say it out of respect for her.*

It's not like she reads these forums...

Does she have AIDs?

[Big-D]

treat her like you ussually would. if she really is terminally ill i dont think she wants to be reminded of it by treating her differently. i would go for it.

considering that we dont know what she is sick with i will seriously tell you that Cuba has some of the best health care.money is no object when it comes to friends.

[Fenix]

*Don't bother asking what her condition is, I'm not going to say it out of respect for her.*

It's not like she reads these forums...

Does she have AIDs?

My guess is breast-or-somethin-only-women-have cancer. Either that or PMS on stereoids.

[cyanide]

Actually guys can have breast cancer too. It's like 2% of the population, though.

[shadowgrin]

It's not like she reads these forums...

She doesn't, but its the principle. She made me swear not to say it so I won't say it to anyone who doesn't know. Its the honor of my word.
Just like Pres. Bush's words when he said that he won't evacuate troops in Iraq despite the scandals and American troops were being killed. I just had to insert that Bush reference for you Riot.

[Fenix]

Actually guys can have breast cancer too. It's like 2% of the population, though.

. They can actually take one of my boobs? What the hell? Men have breasts? Again, what the hell?

[Jona]

I'm planning to convince her to accept the treatment and medication, if all goes well.

If that works, then you have done a great good to her.

What is the reason she does not want to get treatment.

[Riot]

It's not like she reads these forums...

She doesn't, but its the principle. She made me swear not to say it so I won't say it to anyone who doesn't know. Its the honor of my word.
Just like Pres. Bush's words when he said that he won't evacuate troops in Iraq despite the scandals and American troops were being killed. I just had to insert that Bush reference for you Riot.

In order to keep this a non-political thread I will take your cheap shot like a man.

[shadowgrin]

It wasn't a cheap shot Riot, it was a complement to your great President.
I'm staying true to my word, just like Bush.
Despite the criticisms he had in handling Iraq, he still sticks to his plan of restoring peace and democracy in Iraq.

*My statements are not sarcastic*

What is the reason she does not want to get treatment.

Still vague, she's not ready to confide that yet, but I'm guessing some teen angst and depression is also in the mix of why she doesn't want treatment.

[Riot]

It wasn't a cheap shot Riot, it was a complement to your great President.
I'm staying true to my word, just like Bush.
Despite the criticisms he had in handling Iraq, he still sticks to his plan of restoring peace and democracy in Iraq.

*My statements are not sarcastic*

Ohh, okay I get it now. I read it too fast and mis interupted it. My bad.

[cyanide]

Actually guys can have breast cancer too. It's like 2% of the population, though.

. They can actually take one of my boobs? What the hell? Men have breasts? Again, what the hell?

Actually it's 1% of breast cancer cases, and it's usually in the nipples. It's like taking steriods and developing breasts, except we're like AAA cups.

[Andrew]

Sorry to hear it shadow. My advice is to tread carefully around the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing because romance probably isn't something she's thinking about right now. What she definitely needs are good friends though and given how much you seem to care for her I think you definitely fit the bill.

That's not to say you should give up on the whole idea but the last thing you want to do is cause more awkwardness for her at the moment.

[Jona]

Still vague, she's not ready to confide that yet, but I'm guessing some teen angst and depression is also in the mix of why she doesn't want treatment.

She isn't a member of those churches that prohibit medical treatment, right?