Random Vin Diesel Facts (jokes)

[LouisvilleLip]

...and now a random fact about Vin Diesel:

"Vin Diesel once had Parkinsons disease but he shook it off."

Some of the jokes are hilarious while others suck, post some good ones you found.

http://www.4q.cc/vin/

[Jackal]

What sucks is Diesel not being in xXx, Ice Cube? You go from Vin Diesel to Ice Cube? Hell, what's wrong with them? LL Cool J? I'd rather have Diesel but Cool J would be better than Ice Cube.

Hell, Ice Cube?!

...and now a random fact about Vin Diesel:

Most people don't know this, but the bible actually ends with Vin Diesel showing up at the crucifixion with a pair of Uzi's and kicking some Roman ass. Vin Diesel was all like, "Jesus, I totally saved you." Then, off on the horizon, a bunch of Romans show up riding dinosaurs led by Mecha Pontious Pilate. Jesus busts out this sweet ninja sword and says, "Now it's my turn to save you." Then Jesus and Vin Diesel run towards the Romans in slow motion. That's how the bible ends. It's a cliff-hanger. I can't wait for the sequel, "The Bible 2: Water...Into Blood".

[J@3]

Ice Cube's too fat to be in an action movie.

[Fresh8]

Maybe they're advertising that fat ppl dont need to lose weight and its just accepted mroe generally that everyone is equal.. how else did that casey donovon become asut. idol??? ppl just accept that being fat is ok...

Its good for society!

[Null17]

"Vin Diesel" is a Germanic term for "hairless homo".

and no I don't like him...at least as an actor...I never liked most big burly guys who talked like they got something crammed in their mouth (e.g. Sly and Arnold)

[Jackal]

Ice Cube's too fat to be in an action movie.

He should stick to his kind of movies ala Barbershop & Friday/Next Friday. Action star? Please. Next thing we'll see Ashton Kutcher as Terminator: the return of the fag.

[J@3]

Maybe they're advertising that fat ppl dont need to lose weight and its just accepted mroe generally that everyone is equal.. how else did that casey donovon become asut. idol??? ppl just accept that being fat is ok...

Its good for society!

Well I don't know about you, but personally if I was captured by international terrorists doubling as spies who wanted to kill me I wouldn't want some fat guy coming to save me. Give me a steroid fuelled kung fu expert with a single digit IQ for that job anyday.

[Tuomas]

Ice Cube's too fat to be in an action movie.

He should stick to his kind of movies ala Barbershop & Friday/Next Friday. Action star? Please. Next thing we'll see Ashton Kutcher as Terminator: the return of the fag.

although I am a Cube fan, I agree. Actually the whole XXX2 movie sucked.

[Jackal]

I have the first on DVD but I'm boycotting the second. That just isn't right.

People should get some sense in casting. They've casted Tom Hanks as Dr. Langdon from Angels & Demons & The Da Vinci Code. Sheesh. Hello, Harrison Ford? Hello, Richard Gere? Tom Hanks? His monotonus presence is supposed to fill Langdon's role?

[FendeR`]

Vin Diesel wrote the song 'I got you babe', but sold it to Sonny and Cher for 500 gold doubloons and the rights to Cher's face. This is Vin's most prized possession, and after much reconstructive surgery, the end result is an exact replica of a self portrait Vin made, aged 8.

[Drex]

He tickled Ghengis Khan to death.
Vin Diesel's semen is so corrosive that if he were ever to ejaculate it would tear apart the very fabric of the universe.
Vin Diesel is the third Olsen Twin. ( )
Vin Diesel will name his children Vin Propane and Vin Natural Gas. (LMAO!!! )

[skins]

It would be nice if they at least credited somethingawful.com, which is where those jokes are from.

[Matt]

Jae, I dont think Ice Cube is fat, but he is, err Cubed

anyways, Vin Diesel sucks ass XXX sucks ass (even though i havent seen it).

[J@3]

Yeah true he's not really fat in the sense of fat, but he's a bit chunky for that role.

[Boyk]

this reminds me of a skit on Dave Chappelle show lol

" Tom Cruise as the last samarui(spelling)" lol
" Brad Pitt as the mexican" lol
" then he says ive got a plan for a movie of my own, its called The last n***a on earth.......starring Tom Hanks" LOL

i lost it on that, it was hilarious!

[Indy]

Vin Diesel is so annoying. His voice drives me nuts what a fucking dumbass.

[COOLmac©]

i went out the other day and watchhis movie "the pacifier"........my girl enjoys it alot while i continuosly went the bathroom to puke........well that was exaged a bit.....anyways the diesel seems not fit to do kid comedies seriously

[Matt]

is it because he's a child molester?

[air gordon]

Ice Cube's too fat to be in an action movie.

He should stick to his kind of movies ala Barbershop & Friday/Next Friday. Action star? Please. Next thing we'll see Ashton Kutcher as Terminator: the return of the fag.

um nothing wrong with actors trying to branch out and try something new. some don't like to be type casted for their entire career. it doesn't work for everyone but at least they tried

tom hanks has come a long way from 'bachelor party". or jamie foxx, nicholas cage, etc
and on the other end of spectrum is tracy lords, who has been forgotten since her porn days

[J@3]

I'll have to disagree there... guys like Vin for instance could've spent the rest of his working life being "type cast" and making millions by staring in action movies. By stepping out and making this horrific attempt at a movie (lets face it, it's just not pretty) he's denting that tough guy image everyone (teenage girls) had of him which is what made him a star to begin with. You mention Tom Hanks, but the difference there is that it's alot easier to go from a comedy to more serious things than going from action movies to comedy... purely because when you're an action movie type actor, chances are they are looking for primarily the look... what their body looks like, whether they fit the image they want their star to take and then probably just the ability to deliver a few catchphrases. Whereas when you're going from comedy you need alot more acting ability to pull it off to begin with.

All that being said, Kindergarten Cop was awesome.

[COOLmac©]

YEAH arnie rules!!!!

[Matt]

the last action hero was terrible though

can anyone picture Ben Stiller in a drama?

[COOLmac©]

he has a drama film already.....i have seen it but forgot it's title...

[Strike Freedom]

Vin Diesel is only cool in Fast n Furious...
His other movies...

[air gordon]

I'll have to disagree there... guys like Vin for instance could've spent the rest of his working life being "type cast" and making millions by staring in action movies. By stepping out and making this horrific attempt at a movie (lets face it, it's just not pretty) he's denting that tough guy image everyone (teenage girls) had of him which is what made him a star to begin with. You mention Tom Hanks, but the difference there is that it's alot easier to go from a comedy to more serious things than going from action movies to comedy... purely because when you're an action movie type actor, chances are they are looking for primarily the look... what their body looks like, whether they fit the image they want their star to take and then probably just the ability to deliver a few catchphrases. Whereas when you're going from comedy you need alot more acting ability to pull it off to begin with.

All that being said, Kindergarten Cop was awesome.

that's true. action stars could stay in the genre and stand to make millions doing the same thing over and over again. but when these action stars branch out and try something else, i don't think it's done for the money. i don't think governor arnold wanted to be remembered as the terminator or sly as rocky for their respective careers.

and hollywood tough guys like clint eastwood, stallone, ahnold have taken a crack at being in love stories/comedies and i still think they maintained their tough image. don't throw momma from the train was pretty horid but i think rambo/rocky still kicks ass.

succeed or fail, i give them credit for trying. i wouldn't want be known as a one trick pony myself.

as far as making the change from comedy to action or vice versa, i think it's a case by case situation. personally i think it's harder to make the jump from comedy to drama or action. it took me the longest time to forget about "big" and "splash" when hanks was doing philadelphia. i can't still take tom hanks seriously and he didn't sell me on being a hitman in 'road to perdition'