NLSC: A Story Of Survival
Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:09 am
This will be an irregularly updated tale following the NLSC life of "S-Dawg420". The following is not based on a true story.
NLSC: A STORY OF SURVIVAL
As the vehicle pulls into it's final stop, a young man sitting towards the front glances out of his window and tries to get a scope of his new surroundings. Having left the confines of Yahoo! Chat and MySpace, Steve, or "S-Dawg420" as his friends call him, slowly steps off the safety of his bus and ventures into the new and exciting World of internet message boards. Months earlier while trying to find passwords for the Naughty Lesbian Sex Chat website, he encountered a strange and new place known only to him as the NLSC. Whilst bitterly disappointed when he realised there were no girls at the NLSC, let alone naughty lesbians, he realised that this place could possibly come in useful as he vainly attempts to upgrade his downloaded copy of NBA Live 2005. After days of thought and many hours sat in front of his computer with nothing but a box of Kleenex and his parents credit card, Steve decides to pack his bags and leaves in the hope of integrating himself at this mysterious yet inviting place.
No less than ten minutes off the bus, Steve heads towards a sign indicating "Register" and attempts to enter his details.
"You are now registered as S-Dawg420, please check your e-mail and click the confirmation link provided"
Steve ventures into his email account and is faced with some interesting propositions.
"Are you happy with the size of your girth?", enquires a middle aged balding gentleman.
"INCREASE YOUR LENGTH 4-6 INCHES!!!!!!!", excitedly exclaims another.
Steve politely declines these offers, but lets his interest be known as he is part Asian and not particularly blessed in that department. After finally discovering the message the NLSC had promised him, he follows the confirmation and is now a fully fledged poster, as shown by the sign above the entrance "The newest registered user is S-Dawg420". Steve proudly walks through the blue and grey doors of the NLSC, ready to begin his new life and find that elusive Boston Celtics St. Patrick's Day alternate jersey that has escaped him for so long.
Immediately after entering the website, Steve is confronted with a number of labelled doors. The first he sees is called "Forum Rules" and explains "Rules for all forum members and forum moderators". After a few seconds of consideration, Steve decides that since no one else bothers to visit this section then he won't either. Despite the temptation of visiting sections such as NLSC Issues, Hardwood Classics and the Hall Of Fame, Steve decides to press on with his more urgent matter of business, finding the Celtics St. Patrick's Day alternate jersey. Hearing some noises coming from a door slightly further down the hall, Steve enters "NBA Live 07" only to be confronted with yet another set of doors. He enters some doors in an attempt to figure out what their purpose is.
"Hate EA? Sign this petition!"
"What team should I be?"
"Great dynasty Sit, sorry I didn't post earlier when you told me to on MSN"
"Can someone make a tutorial for making headbands?"
"I will release another roster patch when I'm good and ready"
"[[[========ONYX's PATCH THREAD ======== ]]] - New Socks!"
"Hi, can someone make a 1995 Lakers jersey?"
That's it! Brimming with excitement, Steve runs through the door marked NBA Live 07 Patch Requests and loudly exclaims
"CAN SUM1 MAKE ME DA BOSTON CELTIX ALT JERZEE FOR LIVE 2005 PLZ"
The room goes silent. Steve sits nervously and waits for someone to answer his plea, had he asked for too much? Did he come across as desperate? So many emotions flowed through his mind, he considered editing his request but decided against it when he was approached by another boy not much older than he.
"Turn your caps off you fucking retard"
What was this? Steve had been at the NLSC for no less than an hour and already someone was trying to flame him. He whipped his head from side to side and noticed three other posters had also approached him.
"Wrong section moron"
"Oh god, not another n00b"
Steve could feel the tears welling up in his eyes, unsure whether to fight back or run away he was saved by the third poster who had approached.
"My name is Andreas, come with me and I will take you to the correct forum section. Someone will help you there"
Steve and Andreas left the room amongst the chatter and name calling of the other posters. Somewhat shaken but still relieved, Steve glances around at the other signs as they make their way down the hall. NBA Live 06 comes and goes, the noise emiting from that hallway seems somewhat less aggressive than his previous adventure in NBA Live 07. Andreas leads Steve down a hall-way marked NBA Live 2005 and tells him where to make his jersey request. About to thank the moderator for his help, Steve stops as he hears some strange noises coming from a door marked "NBA Live 2005 General Issues". Steve walks towards the door, and just as he goes to open it Andreas grabs him and pulls him away.
"Don't you EVER go in there, do you hear me?"
"But... but why?"
"Because it's not safe for new posters, not all of the moderators around here are this nice you know. Just go to 2005 Patch Requests and ask them about the Celtics jersey there"
Steve nods and Andreas leaves the hall. Why was he so adamant about not entering the room? The last one seemed fairly harmless, what possible dangers could lie behind the General Issues door of a two year old outdated game? Not wanting to anger the unfriendly moderators Andreas warned him about, Steve decides not to enter the room but presses his ear against the door and hears something shocking, yet very familiar...
"MGA PINOY GAMERS, ASSSTTTIIGGG!!!"
To be continued...
NLSC: A STORY OF SURVIVAL
As the vehicle pulls into it's final stop, a young man sitting towards the front glances out of his window and tries to get a scope of his new surroundings. Having left the confines of Yahoo! Chat and MySpace, Steve, or "S-Dawg420" as his friends call him, slowly steps off the safety of his bus and ventures into the new and exciting World of internet message boards. Months earlier while trying to find passwords for the Naughty Lesbian Sex Chat website, he encountered a strange and new place known only to him as the NLSC. Whilst bitterly disappointed when he realised there were no girls at the NLSC, let alone naughty lesbians, he realised that this place could possibly come in useful as he vainly attempts to upgrade his downloaded copy of NBA Live 2005. After days of thought and many hours sat in front of his computer with nothing but a box of Kleenex and his parents credit card, Steve decides to pack his bags and leaves in the hope of integrating himself at this mysterious yet inviting place.
No less than ten minutes off the bus, Steve heads towards a sign indicating "Register" and attempts to enter his details.
"You are now registered as S-Dawg420, please check your e-mail and click the confirmation link provided"
Steve ventures into his email account and is faced with some interesting propositions.
"Are you happy with the size of your girth?", enquires a middle aged balding gentleman.
"INCREASE YOUR LENGTH 4-6 INCHES!!!!!!!", excitedly exclaims another.
Steve politely declines these offers, but lets his interest be known as he is part Asian and not particularly blessed in that department. After finally discovering the message the NLSC had promised him, he follows the confirmation and is now a fully fledged poster, as shown by the sign above the entrance "The newest registered user is S-Dawg420". Steve proudly walks through the blue and grey doors of the NLSC, ready to begin his new life and find that elusive Boston Celtics St. Patrick's Day alternate jersey that has escaped him for so long.
Immediately after entering the website, Steve is confronted with a number of labelled doors. The first he sees is called "Forum Rules" and explains "Rules for all forum members and forum moderators". After a few seconds of consideration, Steve decides that since no one else bothers to visit this section then he won't either. Despite the temptation of visiting sections such as NLSC Issues, Hardwood Classics and the Hall Of Fame, Steve decides to press on with his more urgent matter of business, finding the Celtics St. Patrick's Day alternate jersey. Hearing some noises coming from a door slightly further down the hall, Steve enters "NBA Live 07" only to be confronted with yet another set of doors. He enters some doors in an attempt to figure out what their purpose is.
"Hate EA? Sign this petition!"
"What team should I be?"
"Great dynasty Sit, sorry I didn't post earlier when you told me to on MSN"
"Can someone make a tutorial for making headbands?"
"I will release another roster patch when I'm good and ready"
"[[[========ONYX's PATCH THREAD ======== ]]] - New Socks!"
"Hi, can someone make a 1995 Lakers jersey?"
That's it! Brimming with excitement, Steve runs through the door marked NBA Live 07 Patch Requests and loudly exclaims
"CAN SUM1 MAKE ME DA BOSTON CELTIX ALT JERZEE FOR LIVE 2005 PLZ"
The room goes silent. Steve sits nervously and waits for someone to answer his plea, had he asked for too much? Did he come across as desperate? So many emotions flowed through his mind, he considered editing his request but decided against it when he was approached by another boy not much older than he.
"Turn your caps off you fucking retard"
What was this? Steve had been at the NLSC for no less than an hour and already someone was trying to flame him. He whipped his head from side to side and noticed three other posters had also approached him.
"Wrong section moron"
"Oh god, not another n00b"
Steve could feel the tears welling up in his eyes, unsure whether to fight back or run away he was saved by the third poster who had approached.
"My name is Andreas, come with me and I will take you to the correct forum section. Someone will help you there"
Steve and Andreas left the room amongst the chatter and name calling of the other posters. Somewhat shaken but still relieved, Steve glances around at the other signs as they make their way down the hall. NBA Live 06 comes and goes, the noise emiting from that hallway seems somewhat less aggressive than his previous adventure in NBA Live 07. Andreas leads Steve down a hall-way marked NBA Live 2005 and tells him where to make his jersey request. About to thank the moderator for his help, Steve stops as he hears some strange noises coming from a door marked "NBA Live 2005 General Issues". Steve walks towards the door, and just as he goes to open it Andreas grabs him and pulls him away.
"Don't you EVER go in there, do you hear me?"
"But... but why?"
"Because it's not safe for new posters, not all of the moderators around here are this nice you know. Just go to 2005 Patch Requests and ask them about the Celtics jersey there"
Steve nods and Andreas leaves the hall. Why was he so adamant about not entering the room? The last one seemed fairly harmless, what possible dangers could lie behind the General Issues door of a two year old outdated game? Not wanting to anger the unfriendly moderators Andreas warned him about, Steve decides not to enter the room but presses his ear against the door and hears something shocking, yet very familiar...
"MGA PINOY GAMERS, ASSSTTTIIGGG!!!"
To be continued...
Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:30 am
Hehe, innovative. I'll give you that much.
Atleast it gives me something to do on the forums, I've noticed I'm not that interested in sharing my views with the newish users on the boards, so I'll be looking forward to whenever you decide to update this. A great start for now, I did hope for it to be longer, but hey, beggars can't be choosers eh?
Atleast it gives me something to do on the forums, I've noticed I'm not that interested in sharing my views with the newish users on the boards, so I'll be looking forward to whenever you decide to update this. A great start for now, I did hope for it to be longer, but hey, beggars can't be choosers eh?
Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:34 am
Oh fuck yeah. Good stuff man, this is going to kick some excitement back into General Talk. Hilarious stuff, great writing and awesome idea. Looking forward to the next installment.
"Great dynasty Sit, sorry I didn't post earlier when you told me to on MSN"
Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:35 am
Haha, great read.
You go girl.
You go girl.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:35 am
Oh gosh, that was hilarious. I can't wait untill poor little steve ventures into the photoshop lounge to show off his new work.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:48 am
Oh my god, the last half was a laugh fest. My favorite line was: "Steve politely declines these offers, but lets his interest be known as he is part Asian and not particularly blessed in that department." My favorite part was probably Andreas as the savior and Steve's not-so-brilliant mind.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 3:27 am
Hilarious. Can't wait to read more.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 4:50 am
Hahahahha that was funny as hell.
But one problem:
Items on my computer desk right now:
Glass, Kleenex, Tea towel, Remote, Mums credit card, CD's
But one problem:
a box of Kleenex and his parents credit card
Items on my computer desk right now:
Glass, Kleenex, Tea towel, Remote, Mums credit card, CD's
Tue Oct 03, 2006 5:19 am
^ You're missing out on the bottle of vaseline 
Tue Oct 03, 2006 5:28 am
Vaseline? What for? Windex is all he needs.
What in the heck is a tea towel?
Flite_23 wrote:Tea towel
What in the heck is a tea towel?
Tue Oct 03, 2006 5:28 am
Actually, I have something called "Apis Mellifera" on my draws. Not sure what it is or whos it is but it sure looks like vaseline to me....
EDIT:
A tea towel. A cloth thing that people hang on their ovens and stuff.
EDIT:
What in the heck is a tea towel?
A tea towel. A cloth thing that people hang on their ovens and stuff.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 5:32 am
Oh man that was soo hillarious. Can't wait for the next episode 
Tue Oct 03, 2006 5:37 am
A masterful storyteller at work.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 6:36 am
holy shit this definatly one of the most original stories on nlsc. 
Tue Oct 03, 2006 6:39 am
I like it because it reminds me of NLSC.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 6:48 am
I didn't think it was possible to make a story about the NLSC funny and interesting. But you did .
.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 6:50 am
PinoyIDOL wrote:That's why the thread is for pinoys only so those who are disgusted and feeling asshole, please go away and don't post here...
Oh, to this day that is still funny.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 6:56 am
Great stuff I have to check if the Live 2005 section still has conversations going but just check...
I have to check if the Live 2005 section still has conversations going but just check...
Tue Oct 03, 2006 7:27 am
Haha, so true
Tue Oct 03, 2006 9:08 am
Oh man, you've got everything down perfect; the 'post' style, the 'saviour', even going into the wrong 'room'. It'd be cool if you somehow incorporated other members and their styles/attitudes in too.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 9:32 am
Great read Jae, got some laughs out of it. The sad thing is that this is probably true.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 11:00 am
Hahaha great read man.
haha.
...but lets his interest be known as he is part Asian and not particularly blessed in that department.
haha.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 11:51 am
Andreas is god.
I have a feeling that the pinoys will be some sort of primitive cannibalistic tribe.
Edit:
Heh, pwnt.
I have a feeling that the pinoys will be some sort of primitive cannibalistic tribe.
Edit:
"Great dynasty Sit, sorry I didn't post earlier when you told me to on MSN"
Heh, pwnt.
Tue Oct 03, 2006 12:14 pm
Haha a very entertaining read 
Tue Oct 03, 2006 12:17 pm
If he's Filipino then change MySpace to Friendster. That's what everyone here uses.
Otherwise, great read. Spot on with Andreas.
Otherwise, great read. Spot on with Andreas.